the shower is so warm and my skin feels incredible. i tense and flex. roll my shoulders, arch my back. i pant and snarl. im hot. and with my eyes closed there is nothing but my physicality to sense. i feel great. im at the best point. i feel like sitting down. but i know im in the shower still. i need the water to hit me, precise, not fall on all of me.

i touch myself and its intense. the most intense its ever been. i know what i want and what i can never handle when im lucid, i can do it now and its numbing and, everything. it builds as it does but slowly so slowly. and what im used to as a climax is surpassed and im surprised, its hard work and im working hard already

how much better can it get and how much longer can i keep this up?

i continue and my body is on fire. waves. waves. building up and up. im so high. im so fucking high and its amazing. and then i reach the pinnacle and it lasts an eternity and its huge and im overwhelmed i fucking made it to the end. im exhausted but in euphoria. i gasp and sigh and moan and clutch at the wall with my hands and i have to lean into it with my shoulder.

the comedown is slow and, i ache as it washes away. i feel born again. and i laugh. i laugh now everything is beautiful and my friends are geniuses and everything they say has me in stitches. i cry so many tears i cant see for minutes at a time. my grin is wider than my face.

but i am lucid now. and it has its benefits. more benefits than any other state. and i am satisfied here. and happy. but i think... if it was that good by myself, imagine it with somebody else. and im eager to know!