I spent the last few days with uncle sime out on his new farm. i had a bloody good time out there helping him out and all that. where he lives it is really green and there are a shit load of hills. it is a really good view when u put the 2 of them together. i spent a lot of the time looking at the rolling hills. they are fucking steep, but it looks unreal cool. i spent most of the first day cutting trees back off the electric fence and trying to find the short that was making the fence not work. second day uncle sime put me on the ATV and made me check the drinking tanks for the cows and pick up the branches that we cut the day before. fuck it was a good time hooning around on the 4-wheeler. a few times i thought i was going well and being real clever, but then i felt the wheels slip from under me and it put me back in check....until the next time o found wet grass. 3rd day was much the same as the last 2. just buming round the farm on the ATV and checking little things. making sure the cows were fine and the calfs weren't having too hard a life. then finally it was time to go home. it was a little bit of a bummer, cuz i liked it out there with uncle sime. reminded me of being in the high country again. alpine flash backs.lol..good times on the trip home dad was in ass hole over drive. i usually just chill and let him and mum fight it out and get over it, but he was being a fuck so i thought i would step in...i didn't even really think to step in, i just heard me talking and i was like "fuck...thats you...make sure u don't screw up." dad is very good at dropping the bundle and sulking...and mum is good at giving up and not talking. that solves about half of fuck all. i tried talking to them and getting them to listen and see that they act like fucking 4 year olds sum times, but dad was too far gone in his little sook mood. stupid cunt. he knows that i love him, but he must also see that sumthimes he can be the stupidest shit in the world. i have a feeling that he is going to die one day soon..and i will have the beautiful memories of him being a fuck and a sook. i don't want that. i want him to talk to me more about problems he has had and little life stories that might help me out one day when i come to them. i want to know as much about him as i can before he kicks the bucket. for a long time now i look at people and take what i like about them and try to make myself do it. little things. like eye contact or the volume of their voice on different areas. the one thing that i have been looking at for sum time now is mum and dad. i have made my mind up that i don't want to be like them when i am married and a little bit older. they do fuck all together and don't really do "married" things. they don't hold hands or go on weekend trips just to get away from me and the house. it's been the same for ages now...and one day soon they will wake up and see what they have been doing. and be pissed that they are wasting their time. i just got off the phone to rebecca about 30 seconds ago. fuck it was good talking to her. it always has to make me smile. her word for the night was "mangry"...i was making her mad/angry...and she fucked the words up. i thought it was cute. lol. "u make me so mangry some times..." i will be getting to see her in the next few days..again..( after sunday night ). she tells me that out of 10 she was having a 9 and a half pleasure rating for monday morning. and she "doesn't give 10s out eva, so you should think u were doing a good job" i was told. i guess it would explain the heavy breathing that was going happening on her behalf. there is nothing more sexy than when i start to hear her breathing go deeper and she arches her back and lets out her little moan. that would get to me anywhere any time. lol. she is one of a kind. my feelings for her still haven't changed. when i was talking to my uncle at the farm he said that it sounded like i really liked her, but i should try other girls before i do anything with her. i asked what he meant and he told me- "to understand how special someone is, u must first know and have other ppl to compare them to. go out and chase random girls. get with one or 2 and then think of how special rebecca is. u will understand with in no time that u are doing the wrong thing and u will be set on the right path." the sad thing is...i agree with him. no one really knows how special ppl are until they lose them or have some one esle to compare them to. should i act on it?