I don't know what to make of all this. I'm just in a state of confusion and annoyance. I swore I'd spill everything out in this diary, I wouldn't censor anything but I'm just scared to put my feelings in here because I hardly tell friends how I even feel. I have a boyfriend but I'm not sure if I even like him and then -- there's another guy, and I'm pretty sure I like him but he won't ask me out. He's not the asking-out type and although we're close and it feels as if we're together, but we're not together... so I'm confused about what I can or can't do. My sister told me you don't officially have to be together. But I think it's only right if you do. But it's all so confusing. Because it's like we're together, yet we're not. And I've only told 4 people about this. Liz, Betty, Annie and Linda. I think Annie thinks I'm fucked up for doing this, she told me I was a heartbreaker and I think she might be talking crap about all this. Whatever. It's like friends tell you things and you're not suppose to judge them but help them out. And so far, no one's been helping me out so I'm just confused. When I told Betty I was with Minh, she was like "What?! No! You're suppose to be with the other guy!" And I guess she's right and everyone keeps asking me "WHY?" I don't really know though. He's in Orange County, I'll hardly see him. I hardly talk to him. But the other guy... I see him a lot. And I do have some sort of feelings for him. I don't know... I'm just lost.