gosh its amazing how u can change ur mood in one day...well at least me...in the morning i was like the happiest girl and now all i want to do is lay down and die. well probably not die but sleep for a month or so. in short terms im mad and sad. i used to hate school even if i have lots of friends...u know my situation they make me feel insecure and tiny, and i couldnt wait to get home everyday..but today with all my fukin family problems i was like gosh i want to go to school to be away from this..but then i stopped to think...what the hell ?!? i dont know now which place is worst..thats terrible...before i had a place where i knew i would at least be okay..but not anymore...and we went to this weird concert and they played somewhere over the raimbow from wizard of oz. and i coudlnt stop ctrying...i know thats really stupid but honestly...it made me so terribly sad to see that i dont have hope in anything...i dont believe things will get better or something good will happen to me...when i was little i was daydreaming all the time about amazing places and people...now all i daydream about is what my family and my friends be like if i died or about what would it be like if i wasnt here..stuff like that..anyway i try to be a little more normal but i realize im just faking so i quit it and return to my insecure shelter. i hate it. i guess ill write something when im a little mroe hyper...good night