yeah..i know, i know. i took out the picture, but only because it wasn't showing up on anyone else's computer except mine. so yeah. anyways. today was a pretty okay day i guess. i got up this morning, and went to church. we had another pastor who preached because i guess he's a friend of OUR pastor and he was there visiting or something. but i liked him..a lot, because his sermon was very good. definitely! and i almost felt like he was speaking directly to me. after church i came home and waited on braden to get here. then he came with us to pam and todd's house for lunch. we stayed there until about 3:30 and then came back here. braden and i hungout in my room. and yeah. ummm..around 4:45 we left with my mom and went back to the church for evening service, which was also preached by the guest pastor. and i felt like it was directed towards me ever MORE. yeah. i don't know, it was weird. and the whole time he was preaching i swear he kept looking straight at me and it was soooo weird, but it actually didn't scare me. like, i was able to look directly into his eyes everytime. it was almost like i knew he was talking to me and i really wanted to listen..because i know i'm not where i need to be and that's what the sermon was all about. but anyways. after the service we took braden home and that's about it. that's my AWESOME sunday. well, it's not so awesome. i miss you! do you miss me? do you EVER miss me..because i CONSTANTLY miss you and i wish it would just go away. all of it. why do i always miss you and hope that you miss me just as much when i know you don't?? sometimes i just wish i could let you go..forever..and for it to be as easy for me as i KNOW it would be for you. yeah, that's all i want. ALL that i want. will you make it easy for me. somehow..just make it easier to just let you go. please! let me let you go.