alll day i missed lauren and i couldn't stop! sometimes i like to miss her because it's almost like a sign that she really is important to me. but sometimes, like today, missing her just makes everything seem like it doesn't matter..everything except her and i hate that because it gives her the advantage. that sounds dumb, but it's true. i miss her so much sometimes that i get depressed, because i know that while i'm missing her, she is most likely not even thinking about me. and i probably freaking sound like a lesbian or something but i promise you that i'm not. god...i'm NOT!! she's just my best friend. well, at least i think she is. i'm not sure anymore. but yeah. i hate missing her so much. i HATE it! and no one understands..i know they don't!! they couldn't, because i don't! anyhow, my day was nothing special. it was all just normal. nothing really out of the ordinary happened and because of that it seemed like i just kind of floated through the ENTIRE freaking day. maybe if tara would have been there..instead of in AL all day, then my day would have, at least, been somewhat interesting. hah. she always..ALWAYS makes my day out of the "ordinary". she's seriously the best ever..in a different sort of way. i look forward to math every day because of her. somehow she just makes my day. always! she's NEVER failed at that, and maybe that's why i love her. but yeah. lauren came to my lunch with like 5 minutes left. i think she would have come the whole time but she was at an ortho appointment so that's why she didn't. i'm glad that she did though. i guess i just wanted to see her..if nothing else. but i felt really sick after lunch and it sucked! i really, really hate feeling sick! ugh! it sucks so much!! after school i went to therapy and i ended up crying because my knee hurt so bad. joe (my therapist) made me bend my knee past it's limit and it almost killed me, seriously! when i first got in there today they measured how much i could bend my knee without it hurting and i could only bend it 65 degrees. so i did a bunch of exercises and stuff..then towards the end, he made me bend it 88 freaking degress. and it was hurting soooo bad at like 70 but he made me keep going and i was seriously dying. his goal for me was 80 by the end of the day..and when he kept pushing me to bend it more i thought that i wasn't even making it to 80 and i finally just quit because it hurt so bad. but when i said i was done he looked up at me, with a smile on his face and said, "you just bent it 88 degrees!" and i laid my head down and just cried because i was half stunned/happy, and half hurting more than you can imagine. so yeah, my knee is still extremely sore right now..even as i sit here and type this. i can't stand it. maybe i should take something. lauren i miss you..you have NO idea! none! okay. that's about it. later.