yesterday - nothing really happened at school that's worth writing about except that lauren ended up coming to see me at lunch before she left for crew :-) and it made me very happy indeed. tara called me after school while she was at work because i had tried calling her. she wanted me to stop by and see her, so my mom and i did around 5:00 or so, and since she got off at 5:30 she asked if i wanted to hangout there for a half an hour and go to her neices tee ball game with her, so i did of course :-) yayyyy!! we left and went to her boyfriend travis's house so she could change, and we waited for his friend, kevin, to get there. then we all crammed ourselves into kevin's truck and went to tara's neice's game. it took us 45 minutes to actually find the field where she was playing on, so by the time we got there the game was pretty much over. yeah..we're definitely cool. but i met her parents and they seem nice. so anyhow, after the game the four of us went back to travis's house for awhile, and he went to get a lawn mower. when he got back, the four of us went to pick up tara's 14 year old cousin, jamie, and stopped by a gas station so THEY could get some beer..and they ended up asking these 20 some years old guys to buy it for them. here..i'll explain..tara wanted me to go with them to a party and at first i wasn't sure but i decided to just go, and i guess that's why they bought the beer. we all showed up at the party around 9:30ish and just hungout. there were a ton of people there. mostly seniors and juniors though. tim tuten and all of his friends were there, gretchen p, jesselyn ada, katy nau's x boyfriend, mike and john groom, and millions of other people. they just kept on coming. but yeah, all of them were drinking and smoking either cigarettes or weed. tara ended up getting drunk, but it was only the second time that she ever has so i don't know. that's not really bad, considering there's like a million kids from our school that go out and get drunk every single weekend and stuff. but anyways, kevin kept asking me if i wanted some beer or a cigarette, he asked me so many times that i lost count..but every single time said, "no thanks" or "no i'm fine" or something. so i'm actually very proud of myself. it wasn't as hard as i thought it would be to say no either, but there were times during the night that i WAS tempted to drink..but never smoke. i didn't though. i swear on my life. travis drove us after the party, and he didn't drink so it was fine. tara made sure he didn't drink so we'd have a "safe" driver. so anyhow, they dropped me off at zane and collens house since my mom was staying the night to watch their dog because their gone for the weekend. anyway, i got inside, and was starved so i ate something and fell asleep on the couch. i wish i could write about absolutely everything that happened last night but i can't :-( i guess that's just the summary without much details version of my crazy night. i missed lauren off and on all night because, although tara is awesome and i love her, she'll never mean as much to me as lauren does. and the whole time i heard cussing or something i wanted lauren there with me. i was practically the only person there that wasn't drinking and i felt out of place. i would have much rather been somewhere with lauren then at that party last night. i miss her. i'll tell you about today in my entry later.