So as much as I don't want to admit it, things have ended. I just haven't been able to except the fact that its all over with. I thought the other day would help and it didn't, it just made things a lot worse. Not only is he being distant but also I am too. Its so hard knowing the one that you fell for doesn't even care after trying so hard to be with you. I hate life in general. The only thing that I've been doing all week is crying over this and not sleeping and barely eating because I'm so stressed from the whole situation. I started school a few days ago and I thought that would help change everything but it definitely doesn't. Its so hard and once again I'm hating life. It didn't help the other night that I almost had a breakdown and just left my house for a few hours to get away. I thought so hard about inflicting the pain and the hurt and just cutting my arms up again. I decided that I couldn't do it and left. "I shouldn't hurt myself because other people hurt me" the greatest words to live by, spoken by my best friend. Last night I had one of the best nights of my life hanging out with Chanel and Jessie and the night was extremely weird, but it was amazing in the end. I mean I met an awesome photographer that took pictures of Jake's band (www.tentragic.com) and then another photographer from Real Detroit came up to us three and asked to take our picture. After that he was talking to me about being a model so I think pretty soon I'm going to be taking a bunch of shots and maybe that'll go into some ads or something which could be cool and good in the long run. I won't know more until tonight so we'll see. *crosses fingers* Well I have nothing more to say so I'm going to go try to be un-emo for once.