so this marks my one hundredth and one entry since i last deleted all of my entries and started from scratch. i wish that i could say its been pleasant writing in here, but to be honest, it hasn't been. i've read a few older entries and came to the conclusion that i talk about absolutely nothing. no one reads this because no one really cares about what's going on with my life. i've thought time and time again about just saying good-bye to this diary on this site and just using my livejournal for everything, but i'm not sure that's a good idea either. i'll probably still write pointless entries in here and talk about nothing so do yourself a favor and continue to not read it ... so steve is all i can think about. i can't get him off of my mind. i hope that in two months when he comes home, i won't have wasted time. i mean when he comes home i'll have waited eight months for him and we weren't dating before he left. i just feel like its meant to be because i've liked him for years. i just want to know that i have a chance rather than be waiting around for nothing. i guess we'll see in two months ... wish me luck guys ... everytime i get to hear his voice my heart melts and even if he just sends me a myspace message or something i'm so happy for a few days. i wear his dog tag on my wrist and just can't wait for his return home. ugh ... i miss him more and more everyday. me and chanel haven't been the greatest of friends lately. i'm not blaming her and i'm not blaming myself for that. i think that its a combination of things. we seem to be drifting more and more apart but i think right now neither of us can stop it. ugh ... i don't know what to do anymore. well i'm going to go to bed, i barely got any sleep this weekend while i was up north and i'm exhausted. i hope that you all are doing well and i can't wait for the fourth of july to be overwith because i hate fireworks with a passion. thank god its only once a year ...