[1328] First they're sour then they're sweet... or the other way around??

today was Tim's day off. He has 3 days off next weekend woot. we bought Choli a collar. it had this little ball bell thing on it. she did not like the constant noise at all.. so we tied it to a string and its one of her favorite toys. but she plays with anything.. things on strings, balls, caps, Jefri poo lol, reflections, air.. anything.she'll just flip out all of a sudden and run all over the apartment for no reason. we think we have ghosts now.. apparently cats can see things we can't.. dun dun dunnnn.. i saw a cat perch online the other day so i wanted her to have one.. we got a shelf from goodwill and put some padding on it.. it works perfect but i dunno what there is to look at out the computer window.. we opened the sliding door and let her look at Jefri through the screen door. she kept trying to hide and sneak up on him from behind. I'd put her where he could see her but she'd get all low and prowl back and forth.. if she wasn't so... into eating him.. i think they'd have fun playing hide n seek and tag and chase random things on the floor.. and give each other baths and cuddle. they could be so cute. but no they have to be obnoxious. we got them these little stockings. they are like 3 inches tall. pretty freaking cute.

i tried downloading the trial version of Flash.. but it wont open :[

might have mentioned before but.. stupid goodwill isn't fun anymore.. the Asians abducted this one too and they have all this new stuff... who wants to go to goodwill for new stuff or almost new stuff and pay like a dollar less than what they would originally have paid. stupid. goodwill is for crap. awesome crap you've been dying to find and now its like 3 bucks. but no.. now everything is what it would be in a freaking store. and worse! no discounts just for being awesome like the old guy.. he was cool. on the up side, there was a crazy man walking around talking to himself about phones and buying new work clothes..

Choli is sleeping.

I had a dream that my brother broke my drum set and he bought one for himself and i called Cambria a bad name. and he charged at me but i ran away. and then when they were in his room his new drum set was on the stairs and i took a hammer and hit in a few of the heads. and he comes out and sees and lunges at me. but he's on stairs so i grab his arm and pull him past me and he just flies down the stairs and then i woke up so i dunno.. that would hurt falling like that but i woke up before i could see what happened. its weird.. the dreams kinda symbolic in a way. he did crap to me so i did crap to him. he hurt me. i hurt him. but he is the bastard that started it. and the only difference is that in the dream, i hurt him a lot worse at the end. and in the dream, and knowing its a dream.. it felt good. he's an asshole. everyone is an asshole these days. all this crap I am taking for repeating what my mother said about Cambria. My mother called Cambria a rat face. I said it to piss off Jason not because i think its true. and why did i want to piss off Jason? oh of course.. they many many reasons i could throw out and he did it to me and he hit me and threatened me all the time and i was sick of his shit. and in the past when he has had a problem with me, he'd take it out by making fun of the person i was seeing, so i did the same. the problem... he is the favorite. the golden boy. the poster child? i dunno but of course he has my moms opinion wrapped around his finger. and that means grandma. I am so sick of grandma. she doesn't know what the hell is going on or went on in my whole life but what she's seen. and what is that? when i was a young kid i was a brat and i am the first to admit that. but everyone grows up and she moved away before she saw that. so forever in her mind i am a brat and she has absolutely no respect for me and she can just suck it. suck it grandma. i don't need her opinion. and i don't need my moms acceptance. she is a bitch anyways. and Jason is a jack ass. why do/did i care what the hell these people think anyways? its bullshit and they don't matter. and that good for nothing RETARD Brett can just hang himself for all i care. really, I'll supply the rope. i hate that i felt so horrible over the opinions of these people, or the fact that they would treat me so bad. of course they would. they are all bad people. and i say that with no hesitation. all people are bad with goodness or good with badness. they are bad.. they have some goodness and it comes and goes but overall they are awful terrible waste of spaces. Jason, my mom, grandma, Brett among others who almost got on the list but aren't that bad i guess... are horrible people and i wish i never met any of them. they think abuse it ok. they don't have any consideration for anyone else's feelings. they have no empathy. no common sense. they are arrogant and cold and just plain stupid. i just think its messed up that these people get away with the things they do.. no consequences, no remorse, no conviction in their hearts or whatever lies in its place. maybe my grandma isn't as bad as my mom and Brett and maybe Jason is below those 2. but she condones it and agrees and that's wrong. on every level.

we were supposed to go to dinner with pdk and his wife but. no. that would be walking right into a death trap. i am sick of sticking up for myself. i have nothing to prove to anyone and Tim has been here.. he knows what has happened and he sees the corruption. and i can't just walk into misdirected criticism. Elaine is a liar. Donovan is a liar. I stopped emailing Vannessa. we were sending emails back and forth and i stopped and i didn't know why well i kinda did but i am just sick of being bullshitted around out of nowhere by people i care about. seriously everything is fine with someone and then BULLSHIT out of nowhere. i can't take it. and i know i should have said something instead of just stop but i was depressed back then and i mean.. do i really want a friend who didn't care about me enough to keep me around? i thought her being receptive was enough but its not. why should it be? she's even said people have pulled her back when she pushes them away but she didn't respond to me trying to pull her back and when i stopped sending emails it obviously didn't affect her. i am sick of people who can take me or leave me. i am always in someones life, for good. no questions asked. and people just have all these random conditions.. which i understand but most of the time and in my situations, they don't make sense and its like.. "oh you invited your bf to my birthday so now i am going to not be your best friend EVER again and not even hear what you have to say about it" even tho thats not the situation at all. just like jenae. "i vow to be jeni's best friend for life." #1 goal my ass. Brian, Diane, Donna, etc. all of them can kiss my ass. You do everything someone asks of you. You try. YOU try. not them YOU and what happens?? YOU get fucked over. not them. its nice how that ALWAYS seems to happen. You be the bigger person time and time again.. over and over.. its easy because you do it so much... doesn't anyone else know that phrase besides me and Tim? why are we always being told.. in my case who is saying it to.. well everyone i know and in Tims case.. why isn't his family saying it to Aaron? why do these people just get to act as horrible as they want and people just tip toe around them? it doesn't work like that.. when i was young and a brat people didn't ignore me.. they punished me. I'm so sick of people telling me to look at my behavior.. that's all i did for years and guess what?? its not me. especially now. if anyone thinks I am the cause of what is going on now.. or then... they are insane. its her. and jason. and everyone around who does not want to see the situation for what it is. ABUSE! physical and mental and emotional abuse from both of them. well only physical from jason. i am sick of talking to people in the family. i called my aunt mercy the day before thanksgiving and asked for a recipe for a pink desert she makes. and afterwards i am trying to make small talk, and she just jumps right into a whole speech about God and me and my mom have to work things out. and I'm thinking... what? who is she to say anything to me? she doesn't know ANYTHING about it. Someone needs to go throw GOD in my MOTHERS face. and yeah, i got the whole "you need to work things out with your mom" memo... and its easier said than done. especially because i did all i could do. the woman is impossible. I'm not going to dinner with a freaking pastor who is friends with my mom. we almost did. stupid us. we didn't even remember the last time.. we never learn. we forgive too easily. we're so naive. last time we went for a pre meeting for pre marital counseling with Pdk. and it was ridiculous. he just jumped to conclusions about tim, about our relationship. he called it a "highschool" relationship. i don't know what the heck that means... but just because we aren't tearing off each others clothes at the table or what? you'd think that would be more "highschool" ish.. idk what he meant but its offensive and i had forgotten completely. but thats not why i decided not to go. i could take the assumptions and finally set him straight. what i can't take is what happened last time... when in the middle of our PRE MARITAL counseling thing.. he brings up my mom and reals me into talking about her and says "there was a lot of abuse there" and I nod. and he goes "on both sides" and it just pisses me off. he should know. of all people he should know what she is like. it makes me so angry that no one absolutely no one knows how she is. and that feeling drives me insane inside. Tim knows. i thought it would end there but now with the brett thing. i feel it again. like there is something i know and no one else does and who would believe me anyways if i told them? no one. i feel helpless. just like with jay. my mom can say all she wants how she loves me and lie to people she needs acceptance from. but someday someone has to figure it out right? she took me from that church to get me away from jay. but i forgave jay a long time ago for what he did. or mostly at least. but what she has done is so much worse that what he did. she's taken away my family. she's turned my own brother against me. she plants lies in peoples heads. she uses her authority for evil. she is conniving and manipulative and even more so now in the things she does now.. asking me if i want to come over for thanksgiving. fuck you. i am sick of my feelings being pushed aside for your own peace of mind. i am sick of my well being always coming after Jason's. I'm sick of you always having the words to say. shut the fuck up and DO SOMETHING. you know. if i didn't say another word to my mom and Jason from now until they contacted me... we would never speak again. but i am 100% certain that meanwhile, they'd be telling everyone how its my fault. it goes both ways and i was the lst one to do the calling. the last many calls actually. they don't even know how this feels. none of them have felt this way. knowing something and no one believing you. being pushed out of your own family. being told you aren't trying. and then being blamed for it all.being blamed for things i didn't even do.. like stealing money when it was my cousin. a cousin i trusted and who just let everyone believe it and saw how it effected me. knowing how depressed i already was. all this. and having it happen over and over in different situations with different people only somewhat different but really the same. betrayal . repeatedly. over and over.

huh. this diary entry really took a turn for the worst didn't it.. i almost feel like making it two entries and separate the good vibes from the bad.. almost... i told tim i would be in bed before 2:30am. its past 5am. i know.. I'm psychotic. i don't want to go to sleep. I've worked myself up for no good reason except that its been a few days since the last time and it just takes less time to build up recently.. i feel like one day its going to be too much and my heart is just going to stop finally. i get this sharp pain and the start of an anxiety attack builds as i write and i have to gasp for air and calm down and then continue.. its not normal. i know my life is not even comparable to so many people who have it worse and i feel even more horrible for even complaining about it. because this is like a grain of sand compared to their beach of problems. but I think writing helps. it always has. i promised timmy i wouldn't cut anymore. I wont. but in the meantime.. i will continue to write the longest most pointless overly self indulgent rants you've ever heard. and with the worst punctuation. heh.

i guess the thing that hurts the most is.. they are my family. and the whole boys come and go but you'll always have your family.. Timmy isn't going anywhere.. they did. or blood is thicker than water.. what happened to mine? this blood is diluted.. its fake. there wouldn't be a saying if it wasn't a general concept. a universal theory. so what happened? i get mad. and i have reasons. so many. but I fight. i don't just walk away. even when i have said in the past "i am done".. i come back. they don't. they could take me or leave me... its not right. fighting means you love someone. not physically but sometimes u need to say things that are hard to say.. you have to say what u feel even if someone doesn't want to hear it.. if you don't.. then how can you say you care about them? even after everything they put me through i tried. and they blame me for finally walking away from it. if i stay they blame me. if i go they blame me. they can point their fingers at the splinter in my eye but they don't see the log, the huge huge log in theirs. and splinters are pretty damn small.. i cant stop writing. that phone call with my aunt mercy just really pissed me off and i was trying not to think about it and i guess i just cant help it. i sent jason a message just now. i pretty much just said i am over trying. they can just have a nice life without me for all i care. they are being pathetic to hold on to their little grudges when i have gotten over so much before and after. ok.. i am forcing myself off the computer. i am...

i hate when my entries are on the front page.

725 hit(s) pee in my bucket  
Comments
December 1st, 2008 @ 11:05am
as reply to your comment: At that moment he was able to force me to have sex besides he was drunk. would you prefer me to push him out of bad? or scream out like helpp mee... nobody would believe a girl who sleep in a man's bed. So you wouldnt have any chance to ask for help. i thought just to let him hold me prevent this situation to get worse. and i was right on that.he just slept and when he woke up he was feeling sorry.anyway it is just a place that ic an tell my secrets nobody here knows me in real
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Human Check: 2+2=


Entry List
5/ Insanity
4/ Inventory
3/ Anger
2/ Focus
1/ Recovery
Trial & Error
Hello Again
Last Night
September
How
Good Job
Squishy ice cubes
Hours
Breathless
blank
Over Simplified
The Afterglow
21. Dots and Dashes
17. In The Dark
10. Among Other Things
[2060] Le Temps d'un souffle...
[2025] Coup de Grace
[2017] The Way That It Will Be
[2006] Things That Matter
[2005] It
[2002] Must Be Nice
[1997] Coincidental
[1996] Apparently
[1981] Good morning,...
[1962] Praha II
[1968] Praha
[1966] Danke Scheon
[1963] Forlander
[1905] Flarm
[1883] Because
[1855] Cloudy with a Chance...
[1851] Double Rainbows and...
[1849] Then You Can Start
[1841] The Silence
[1829] Desires
[1827] Changing Directions
[1826] Damaged Need Not Apply
[1825] /Dies
[1824] Acceptance
[1822] Trust
[1819] Banana in the Dark
[1816] What's This?
[1815] 6th
[1811] Wabbits
[1809] What's the Dinosaur...
[1807] Grandma and Bea
[1806] Dear God this...
[1803] Cheers
[1797] One After the Other
[1796] Doors
[1794] Welpy
[1792] Ruh-roh!
[1790] Forgotten
[1787] C-3PO
[1786] Let Me Be Nice
[1785] ORRR
[1784] Sh!t Talking?
[1783] DO
[1782] Under the Hood
[1781] Duck Duck.. Goose?
[1780] Handbone
[1778] 1 week
[1777] Family?
[1774] GIRLS
[1769] 26 - 28
[1768] Pros and Cons
[1767] Bell Jar
[1766] To Be Out of Here
[1764] The Grove
[1762] Forgot Again
[1761] Recently
[1760] Never Learn
[1759] things
[1758] Oh Hello
[1757] A Feeling
[1756] Stabby Knight Syndrome
[1755] Aubrie
[1754] Getting Things Done
[1752] Ketchup Is Sticky
[1750] .
[1749] So Pissed
[1748] The Worst
[1747] Cake Pops
[1746] Don't forget
[1745] Birthday
[1744] Toxic
[1743] Incomplete
[1742] Exiting Narnia
[1741] Because My Head Hurts
[1740] House
[1739] Now I Have No Nose
[1738] I Miss It
[1737] All The LIttle Things
[1736] Top Shot
[1735]
[1734] Carpe Diem
[1733] Sleep Apnea
[1732] Soo...
[1731] You Don't Have To Say...
[1729] Give It Up
[1728] Too Good To Be
[1727] People
[1726] Guess What!
[1725] RIP my sweet boy
[1724] Goodbye Sweet Boy
[1723] Intussesception
[1722] Beef Stew
[1722] Lemons
[1721] Nightmare
[1720] Being Nerdy
[1719] Conflicted
[1718] More Time To Write
[1717] Hopefully
[1716] My Moose
[1715] Bruxism
[1714] The Grind
[1713] Ambiguity
[1712] The Worst Ever
[1710] Its a date?
[1709] Weird
[1708] Have To
[1707] Overnight Vegan
[1706] No kidding
[1704] Want
[1703] Creeps
[1702] Goodbye E3
[1701] Day 1
[1700] E3 2011
[1699] Don't Print Bobby Pin
[1698] Go Carts!
[1697] People
[1696] L.A. Noire
[1695] Jefri's Condo
[1694] But for now...
[1693] Stomach Issues &...
[1691] Loved
[1690] Stupid
[1689] Snuggly Blankets and...
[1688] I Didn't Ask Him To
[1687] Life and Love
[1686]
[1685]
[1684] Book Update
[1683] Double Standards
[1681] That's what she said
[1679] Ignorance
[1678]
[1677]
[1675] Poor Little Bird
[1674] DONE & DONE
[1673] Burn
[1672] Thinking Like A Man
[1671] 127 Days
[1670] Qualities and...
[1669] Momentum
[1668] Elegantly Posed To...
[1667] Whatever
[1666] TMJ and TMI
[1665] Neat video is neat
[1664] He said hi, i said...
[1663] Going Home
[1662]
[1661] Double Rainbow!!!
[1660] POOP
[1659] Woah Buddy
[1658] If I Only Had an Axe
[1657] FullTimez and Bennies
[1654]
[1653] Douchebags
blank
[1650] Solutions for Adults...
[1649] Orrreeeallly-ohes?
[1648] Wishy Washy
[1647]
[1646] Who Cares
[1645] Irlen Lenses
[1644]
[1643] That's Money Honey
[1642]
[1641] All Week
[1640] More Than Anything
[1639] Most Likely
[1638] /stab
[1637] And I don't know how
[1636] Dang
[1635] The Soup
[1634] But I Like Lobsters
[1633] Inception
[1632] Actually...
[1631] Responsibility, whats...
[1630] E3
[1629] WTF
[1628] /Stab.
[1627] Cheesus Christ!!
[1625] UHF
[1624] So Yeah
[1623] Speaking of...
[1622] Punchy?
[1621] For Now...
[1620] It Didn't Suck
[1618] Jefri Has A Girlfriend
[1617] All I Need To Be
[1616] E3!!
[1615] Higher Ups and Mochi
[1614] Headshots
[1613] Baby you got it
[1612] Eat My Heart
[1611] City Walk and Central...
[1610] Closer
[1609] Monologues and Floppy...
[1608] To be or not to be...
[1606] Clearly
[1605] She's already gone away
[1604] What If...
[1603] Grrrr
[1602] A Short Cut We'll...
[1601] As Stars Lean Down to...
[1600] Quickie
[1599] Exactly
[1598] Douche Baggery
[1597] Doppleganger
[1596] Cream Cheese?
[1595] I Hate Vista
[1594] To The Window, To The...
[1593] Countrylife vs...
[1592] Karrett
[1591] Flash
[1590] Rihanna
[1589] Spinning
[1588] The Tip Of The Ice Berg
[1587] Candy Coated Clouds
[1586] Changing All The Colors
[1585] Prestige
[1584] Christmas Cards
[1583] The Only Road I Know
[1582] You Don't Say...
[1581] Seriously?
[1580] Manuel
[1579] Sooner Than Later
[1578] A foxtrot above my head
[1577] Short
[1576] Modern Warfare
[1575] Emmett??
[1574] Have Fun Storming The...
[1573] Cock Pushups?
[1572] Let This Go
[1571] Tell Them To Build A...
[1570] UUUAGAHHHRGGHH!
[1569] STUPID!
[1568] New Moon
[1567] Look Me In The Eye
[1566] Where The Lines Overlap
[1565] To Bury The Castle
[1564] If Only
[1563] Attention Attention
[1562] Ass Burger
[1561] What and What Not
[1560] Bored
[1559] Male Prima Donna
[1558] Translucent
[1557] Bayside Halloween Show
[1556] Panic Research
[1555] No Sympathy
[1554] Claim To The Evidence
[1553] Undo The Knot You've...
[1552] Use Somebody
[1551] 1st Appointment
[1550] Dear Tragedy
[1548] The Nights That We...
[1547] I Threw It On The...
[1546] And I Feel Nothing
[1545] Birthday Times
[1544] Bored.
[1542] Cry Me A River
[1541] Screaming
[1540] MAYDAY!
[1539] Why 2K?
[1538]
[1537] Next Time You Point A...
[1535] Now I Can't Trust...
[1534] Je' Taime
[1533] That's What You Get...
[1532] I'm at it again
[1531] Killing Time
[1530] With Every Year That...
[1529] ready
[1528]
[1527] Home Sick
[1525] Fingertips have...
[1524] I Don't Get It
[1522]
[1521] Hardly Indestructable
[1520] Time Turned Fragile
[1519] The Right To Write Me...
[1517] The beginning of all...
[1516] You Beach
[1515] Personality Quiz
[1514] Awkward
[1513]
[1512] What and Whatknot
[1511] What's in a name?
[1510] Abnormally...
[1508] Crappy Friends and...
[1507] Noobs
[1505] Bunnies leave bite...
[1504] Cool friends and...
[1502] How to fix everything,...
[1501] Speak
[1500] rambling
[1499] Blurrr
[1497] Bubbles
[1496] Giant Jeni
[1495] Being grown up is silly
[1494] It ain't easy bein'...
[1493] Experiment
[1491] Today was a down day :p
[1490] & my heart would hit...
[1488] Drink up Beautiful
[1486] & it starts just like...
[1485] home
[1484] Kazzingachicken?
[1483] mah
[1482] take me home
[1481] Cold & Blue & Lifeless
[1480] Long survey
[1478] Blah blah blah.. banana
[1477] O boy!
[1476] So I pace the halls to...
[1475] Books & Cold Stones
[1474] ARG!
[1473] Tortures of the damned
[1472] Just enough to love you
[1471] Sometimes..
[1470] Dear Tragedy
[1468] No one understands
[1467] Nice
[1466] We'd stay there forever
[1465] Mayday, Mayday!
[1464] Sundays
[1463] Get Your Fix
[1461] "Husbandy"
[1460] Eat My Brains & I'll...
[1459] Ring, Ring!
[1458] Do do do . Banana.
[1457] 365 Reasons Why...
[1453] Ask and you shall...
[1452] Tim Always Knows
[1451] Almost Here
[1450] New Moon
[1449] On Purpose
[1448] This Place
[1447] Prozac Problems
[1446] lets change things up...
[1445] Coming Close
[1444] Meh
[1443] Seriously?
[1442] Tick Tock
[1441] Bad Ass
[1440] People Suck
[1439] Its nice
[1438] Sanding Sucks
[1437] Today was good
[1436] A Happy Ending
[1435] Somersaults
[1434] The Panic Begins
[1433] Craigs list & Cat...
[1432] Pretty n' Pink
[1431] Lame News
[1430] Are you Mocking me?
[1429] Perfect POnies
[1428] And Everything Just...
[1427] Victims from the...
[1426] 2 Weeks to Live
[1425] o Joy!
[1424] Pros and Cons
[1423] DJ Hero
[1422] And then 3 became 5
[1420] Mac FTW
[1419] EEEEE I HAS A MAC!!!!!!
[1418] 10 Reasons
[1417] Unexpected Gifts
[1416] Much Better Things..
[1415] Bologna?
[1414] 2 Ducks Sitting In A...
[1413] Cheats and Drums,...
[1412] Sunset and Santa Monica
[1411] Topanga can Suck it
[1410] Jeni Land
[1409] Bigger People
[1408] What A Noob
[1407] Titles and Numbers
[1406] Sleeping In
[1405] Deflate The Air From...
[1404] Bite Sized Pieces
[1403] Tuesday
[1402] Torrance vs El Segundo
[1401] QA Training Day 1:
[1400] Hi world.
[1399] A Note On Your Bed
[1397] Pink Lemonade
[1395] Its Been A While
[1394] Peanut Butter...
[1393] Snap Back
[1392] Freaking Out
[1391] Activision
[1390] Doctor Appointment
[1389] Cake
[1388] Until My Feet Don't...
[1387]
[1386]
[1385] Jeni the Builder
[1383] 100 lbs!
[1382] Broken or Gross
[1380] But We Will Never Fold
[1378] The Cure
[1377] Too Little Too Late
[1375] Is Everyone Here...
[1374] Now I Wonder
[1371] Iz Businez Time
[1370] Oh Yaz?
[1369] personality in a paste
[1367] At the Beginning
[1366] Typical
[1365] Resolution
[1364]
[1363] I am no bird
[1361] Its A Pity...
[1360] Not So Novice...
[1358]
[1357] Yahoo..
[1356] People I know
[1355] Christmas 08
[1354] Almost
[1353] Neverending
[1352] Who do they think they...
[1351] COMPLETELY
[1350]
[1348] Christmas Shopping
[1347] Silly Goose
[1346] Junk Mail
[1345] Soul Mates
[1344] Oh Really?
[1343] Walk On Water Or Drown
[1341] Run Away, And Never...
[1340] A Picture Worth a...
[1339] And I've Brought Some...
[1338] Plain Yogurt
[1337] BFF's
[1336] Eyes Meeting Over The...
[1334] And Since We've No...
[1333] A show of hearts, who...
[1331]
[1330] Never FInish A Book
[1328] First they're sour ...
[1327] Corners and Cones
[1326] Choli
[1325] Thanksgiving part II
[1324] Thanksgiving part I
[1323] Pancakes & Candied Yams
[1322] Tongue-Tied and...
[1320] Thanks But No Thanks
[1319] New Hair
[1318] Changing All ThE COlors
[1317] Fairness Is Failing
[1316]
[1314] And All Of Those...
[1312]
[1311] Such Boundless Pleasure
[1310] The Bird Is the Word
[1309]
[1307] A GOsh Darn...
[1306] Its Funny Cause It's...
[1305] Buttcritter
[1304] To Be Loved
[1303]
[1301] History In the Making
[1298] Best Day Ever
[1297]
[1296] Cry Baby
[1295] Bored.
[1294] Keep talking
[1293] Thrill Planet
[1292] Peachy
[1291] Hot n Cold
[1290] Are we having fun or...
[1289] To Be Haunted
[1288] Blue sweater and an...
[1287] WHOA 1500! plus 1
[1286]
[1285] The Only Song
[1284]
[1283] awkward..
[1281] Drain the Blood
[1280]
[1279] All Nighter
[1278]
[1277]
[1276] freister661
[1274] Progress Continued..
[1272]
[1268]
[1267] Cold & Blue & Lifeles
[1266] Everything we need is...
[1265] Made of Glass
[1264] pissed
[1263] frozen things they all...
[1262] only..
[1261] my domain
[1260] If you can't beat em,
[1258] You never missed a...
[1257] Mental Abuse
[1255] very tricky
[1254] The Fall
[1252] Denial Never Hurt...
[1251] Ahhhh
[1250] Yet Again
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[1462] Forgetting is a sin
[1461] My Dress
[1460] how now brown cow
[1458] The Basics
[1456] the littlest mermaid
[1455] Helpless.
[1454] Forgive and Forget
[1453] Retraction
[321] Don't read me, I have a...
[142]I dont want to run...
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[1450] 321 Penguin!
[1449]
[1448] High Above the Trees
[1447]
[1446]
[1445] Mama Mia
[1444] I Dream In Wishes
[1443] Save the Date
[1442]
[1439] Eyes Glued To His
[1441]
[1438] You Call It Fate, I...
[1437] Banana Pancakes
[1435] It Felt So Wrong, It...
[1434]
[1433] Cmon Cmon
[1432]
[1431] And I liked it...
[1429] Love and Marriage
[1427] Artificial flavored...
[1426] I landed on the island...
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[1424] Not Again..
[1423] How do you know?
[1421] Cuz I'm always on the...
[1420] Pictures
[1419] 4th of July
[1418] Wusband and Hife
[1417] Call It Karma
[1416] Viva Lost Cell Phone
[1415] It could be the same...
[1414] If you had a chance to...
[1413]
[1412] Maybe Not
[1411] Family Fued
[1410] I'mma New Soul
[1409] Maybe Monday
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[1408] Taste these teeth...
[1407] One Banana Stand At A...
[1406]
[1405] Zingy Zingy Zingy
[1404] Early Bird Gets Nothing
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[1401]
[1400]
[1399]
[1398] It Starts.
[1397] False Pretense
[1396] My eyes are melting
[1395]
[1394]
[1393] Hello Kitty
[13 92] Friedly Fire
[1390] Hands Down
[1389] Oh Sexxay...
[1388]
[1387] Like A Desperate...
[1386]
[1384]
[1382]
[1381] Mini Roses
[1380] "MOO"
[1379] In the Hole
[1378]
[1377] Rock the Cradle
[1375] As Soon As You Start...
[1372] Run Baby, Run
[1371] And it teases you for...
[1370] Images
[1369] The Closer
[1367] Release
[1365] Stop and Stare
[1366] What Gets You Through...
[1364]
[1363]
[1361] Easter Eggs and Karma...
[1359] Michelle My Belle
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[1356] BAH!
[1355] Some People
[1354] Hmm
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[1350] BEYOND
[1349]
[1348]
[1347] Imagine All The People
[1346]
[1345]
blank
[1343]
[1342] A Job Well Done?
[1341] Daily News
[1338] My Foot Is Asleep
[1337]
[1336]
[1333]
[1332] Simple and Plane?
[1331]
[1330] Bendy Straws
[1329] Is Narnia in the...
[1328] I'm A New Soul
[1327] Hermit Crabs Are Gross
[1326] Last Last Time
[1325]
[1324] Juxtaposed
[1322]
[1321] zours
[1320] It's You
[1318] Setting the New...
[1317] He likes how I shake...
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[1313]
[1312] MVP
[1311]
[1310] superimposed
[1309] very funny
[1307]
[1306] The Definition Of A...
[1305] Homemade Cards And Die...
[1304]
[1303] I Can't Deny
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[1300] Oh
[1298] Pointlessness
[1296] Not To Brag..
[1294] The White Stuff..
[1293] A Matter of Time
[1291]
[1289] Just Get Over It
[1288] Well
[1286] Makin Babies
[1285] Ginger Bread Houses
[1284] Jam and Pim
[1283] Oh Man
[1282] Thankful
[1281] Half Alive
[1280] Hundreds of Pages,...
[1278] Phantom of the Opera
[1277] The MEat Of LOve
[1276] So, So I Don't Know
[1274] For Little You Or...
[1271] Happy Feet
[1270] Epic
[1269] Liife is Wonderful
[1267] This Isn't Hollywood
[1265] That's What HE said
[1263] I was so
[1262] Boys Like Girls
[1261] I Am Over It
[1259] I Feel Good All Over
[1258] Running Right Behind...
[1257] Officially Unofficial
[1255] Naked Lunch Is Natural...
[1256] Blue Jean Baby
[1254] I Know Everything...
[1253] Footprints On My...
[1252] harlequin girl
[1251] uhm
[1250] Graphic Design
[1248] That's
[1247] Well..
[1246] Sunday Morning
[1244] i might disappear
[1243]It's too...
[1242] Like A Drug
[1240] hear me out
[1238]
[1237] Aww and AHHH!
[1235] Santa Cruz
[1234] Painting
[1233]
[1227]
[1225] Pencil Sharpeners &...
[1223] Why not..
[1222] Nothing without you
[1220] just another survey
[1217]
[1216 1/2]
[1214] i need a poptart
[1212] Kelly Anne
[1211] running away
[1210] yellow and lime
[1205] Let it be
[1206]
[1203] It's Official
[1202] BLAHHHHG
[1099] Across The Universe
[1201]
[1098]
[1095] title and registration
[1094] Are You Ready To...
[1092] I shot you in the face...
[1091]
[1090] whatever what?
[1089] breathing
[1087] finish this later
[1086]
[1084] like a raindrop
[1082 1/2]
[1082]
[1081]survey thingy
[1079] this is a reminder
[1078]
[1076]
[1075]
[1074]
[1072]
[1071] funny face
[1070] p50
[1068]
[1069] and eat it too
[167] renee is gay
[166]skoozy
[1065] Couch
[1063] I dont care
[1060]
[1058] The Rest
[1057] finding neverland
[1054]
[1050] no title.
[1048] radio on
[1047] in other words..
[1045] If you ever had a...
[1043] I hold sunlight &...
[1042]
[1040]
[1039] going nowhere
[1038]
[1036] The way I am
[1033] bridal shops and zuma...
[1032] my only one
[1031]
[1029] hunger
[1027] POP goes my heart
[1026] tooools
[1025] bodily functions
[1024] Gravity
[1022] photoshop 101
[1020]
[1019] diligently doubtful
[1018] TSS
[1017] not worth mentioning,...
[1014]
[1012]
[1013]
[1011]
[1010] BAH!
[1008] oh, you're alone
[1007] mind boggling
[1003]
[1002]
[1001] "sup"
[1001]the real 1000
[1000] and the winner is!...
[999] spanglish
blank
[985] and makes me realize
[986] Makes Me Wonder
blank
blank
[982] the last couple years
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[980] your hands are mine to...
blank
blank
[977] and all the kings...
[975] commonplace occurances
[974] there aint nothin to...
[972] nothing gold can stay?
blank
blank
blank
[967] i think not
[966]
blank
[964] shooting star
[961] double sided tape
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[954]
[953] i hate sleep
[952] Going to the chapel &...
[951]
[950]
[949] I cant think of a...
[948] All about those words..
[947] Geek in the Pink
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[944] Hits her like a ton of...
[943] adhesive bandages...
[942] Ryan Atwood?
[940] sibling rivalry
[939] he's gotta be strong,...
[938] one day i slowly...
[935] walkign and singing...
[932] amanda must die...
[930] In a flash...
[929] Humphry Bogart stole my...
[928] timmy fry fry
[927] i got you babe
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[918] Don't let the..
[917] August I'll see you...
[915] cuz its sexy
[914] january 6th
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[910] This Christmas
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[909] wow i wrote alot of...
[908] Thailand or bust
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blank
blank
[904] coffee break
[901] Best buy blows
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[895] parinoid
[894] Curve balls
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[891] almost alive
blank
[889] this could be different
[786] cold stones and warm...
[785] globalization is...
[783]
[781] screw it
blank
blank
[779] From the freeway
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[763] tonight
[762] boring again
[759] boring
[760] top of the mornin to ya
[758] no name face
[757] pretty much...
[752] i cant find my phone...
[750]
[749] dirty pirate hooker
[747] things change...
[744] on wednesdays we wear...
[745] ash hole
[746] i guess..
[740] mondayness
[743] it helps
[742] 21st
[738] fine.
[739] i hate myself
[735] So Little Purpose...
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[732] well..
[731] Bianca Bear
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[729] yeah..
ahh.
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[719] Mothers Day
[718] Jefferton
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blank
blank
[714] one thats all your own
[711] X-games continued
[710] X-games
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[707] Country Time
[706] We'll hide indoors
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[704] Cuz I Cannnnn
[703] my depth perception
[702] Innocence Again
[700] the plan
[698]entry title
[697] In the FACE!
[695] In Roswell
[694] Shirt PUrses
[693] One Word...
[692] Now You Know
[691]
[688] Number Two
[685] just catching up
[684] Sit D is Healed
[683] Gotta make that mottor...
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[679] Entirely Useless
[677] ya know..
[675] Straight Up Now Tell Me
[673] ANother Way
[672] Blame It On Bad Luck
[671] December 9th
[670] All You Wanted
[649] Until this echo can...
[648] Hey
[667] 8:40
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[664] Douse the lights
[665] i tried to be...
[660] All In Your Hands
[659] subside
[658] Caricature of intimacy
[657] & paying in naivity
[656] whats best?
[653] It starts
[652] "How Are You?"
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blank
blank
[647] So contagious
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[646] The Art of Growing Up
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[643] Tomorrow is the new...
blank
[641] but its better if you do
[640] storage
[639] heart & soul
[637] so far
[636] writers block
[635] titles are overrated
[633] Raindrops on Roses
[632] 5:15 and beyond
[629] lunch backwards is...
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[627] I'm the new cancer
[626] TRY
[625] swing kids
[624] knmsdn
[623]untitled
[622] Hippie Monkey
[621] A quick one
[618] Viva La Difference
[617]
[615] CABOOSE!
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[612]
[610] Just this once
[609] What Good Is It?
[608] Pour it out
[605] 6:25
[604] teddy grams and kelly...
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[602] thingy i do
[600] Blank
[598] PG
[596] Unthinkable
[595] ...on both accounts
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[592] On a day like this
[591] Take my breath away
[589] forever to get here
[588] survey
[587] sos
[585] so this is the new year
[583] back in black
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[580] christmas
[579] Nite before Christmas
[577] Click here
[575] Brown and baige
[574] Indestructable
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[570] Chicken Little
[569] Out and about
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[565] American Reject
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[562] the taste of saint...
[560] Turks!
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[558] Marriage and divorce
[556] Hey tony!
[555] PICTURES?
[552] Beachen'
[551] Whatever
[550] The Travis
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[547] Not gonna happen
[545] Like Fandango
[544] Cute in the rain
[543] Shocker
[541] cereal killer
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[539] TWO stupid to count
[537] bleh
[536] All sortsa time
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[533] unfinished
[532] Keep me in tune
[531] Hoctober 31st
[530] literate and stylish
[529] water fills these open...
[527] too good to be true
[526] ESPN or something
[524] Picture this
[522] Lime Flavored
[521] What gives?
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blank
[517] Worth the pain
[513] 20 questions
[512] Dear Diary
[509] burts bee's
[511] meow, isnt that nice?
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[507] I ate carrots
[506] five O six
[504] That simple
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[502] Throw it back
[499] September ends tonite
[498] Juxtapose myself and me
[496] Walls of Porn
[495] Mommy dearest
[494] NUTS!
[491] Cuz after all..
[490] sendin me straight to...
[489] Shrinking?
[487] a glimpse
[486] YAy for that
[485] weezererererer...
[484] So deep that it didnt...
[483] No heavy thoughts
[481] pink pops and red eyes
[480] pictures cuz i can
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[478] CASTLES IN THE SKY
[477] Turn It Inside Out So I...
[476] Big Brothers
[474] Short and Stout
[473] The M word!
[472] Gaps in History
[471] Oh guess what
[470] my heart is spoken for
[468] the biggest yellow...
[467] Goodwill
[466] Crazy Selfish
[464]
[463] Left Unsaid
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[460] monday
[456] A Good Scream!
[455] When I wanna be
[453] Incoherent response
[452] No Friends
[450] Fall to pieces
[451] Delta pics
[449] For a week at a time
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[447] I can't live
[445] its all in you
[446] Always something
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[442] I'm a notebook?
[441] Ventura theater
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[438] Feel and felt better
[436] ndusfsduifbsdfg
[435] Dont put it out with...
[434] 1 Month
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[431] Boys are like
[430] Nothing
[429] basically
[428] For a week
[426] Like riding a bicycle
[423] i like bruises
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[422] Delta whAAAt?
[419] sean & jeni pictures
[417] "whAAAAAAA?"
[416] coOOOOOokie crisp!
[415] frikken whoa
[414] yawn
[413] TGI Friday
[411] live a colorful life
[412] For you only
[410] Accuse me?
[409] How much longer will...
[408] duckie hearts P-tree
[407] freak out
[406] wanna bake me cupcakes?
[404] i have a sean?
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[400] 400!!!!!
[399] Beachen'
[396] new season
[395] pictures!!!
[394] are we in space? do we...
[393] mmmmHMMM!
[391] water is for quiters
[390] I love lamp
[389] But i just keep tryin
[388] kick me
[382] Look at the MOON
[385] To make plans and...
[381] suck
[383] show time
[382] pictures are fun
[381] to eat or not to eat?
[380] why do u wait on me?
[379] yeah. but what color...
[377] i think i might just..
[374] something unpredictable
[373] If you see a change in...
[371] such sweet sorrow
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[367] the roaring 20's
[364] poo poo
[360] heh.. 360 eh?
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[356] Entry Title
[355] you make me wanna "la...
[352] Who am i?
[343] The spectrum's A to Z
[342] Kiss me I'm romantic!
[341] Oh! Oh yes indeed
[340] We looked like giants
[339] DOH!
[338] TOM WENT TO THE MAYOR!
[337] Shhh don't tell!
[336] The dingo ate my...
[335] Little miss apprehensive
[334] Shoes on the ceiling
[333] lalala da bears
[331] And ended so soon
[329] PANCAKED...
[328] Red lettered day
[327] My life....
[326] Baby eys
[325] Does evil exist?
[323] So sick of being tired...
[321] Noticing Nothing Again
[318] Sat and Sun
[316] You + Me = Us
[315] Not Even A Little Bit
[314] Love and Angels
[313] Bu-bu-bu-bunnies are...
[312] R is for Rawr
[310] Are you ugly?
[309] a new start
[308] I hate them all
[307] not going anywhere
[306] 3 In The AM
[305] I dream of... Justin...
[303] I'm invisible
[302] It's Over
[300]THE
[298] when they doubt
[297] Hmm.
[296] nope, not at all
[295] unfinished
[294] Tehacha' what?
[293] And Yet
[292] not finished
[291] Tom Boy
[290] HASSELHOFF!!!!
[285] NOWWWWWWWW!
[287] ninja what?
[284] sing that song for me
[282] EEK!!
[279] gentry
[280] Dun na na na
[277] The List
[275] For Once
[274] my pet wombat
[273] It Does...
[272] Like a donut?
[271] ouch, my liver
[270] misery or missouri?
[267] Space Up In My Head
[269] If You Can
[265] what i was expecting
[266] nothing
[263] In your head
[262] and nothing but the...
[261]
[260] two-sixty
[259] heart in a blender
[257]
[256] i can't feel my arm
[255] stomp my face to mush
[254] apples can runner fast...
[253] every little thing
[251] and i was like...
[250]
[249]
[248]um yeah?
[247]i got it at ross?
[246]after the glow
[243]sing it out
[244] kiss me on the mouth
[245] what would you name a...
[242]psycho supergoddess
[239] everything she had
[240]2 all you mother truckers
[238]one line at a time
[233] a theory of my own
[232] whistle while you work
[230]GO billy GO!
[228]Hope your doin well
[227] yeah yeah uh huh
[226] BOOGErs!
[222] adam wasn't there
[221] emotionally exhausted
[220] endless rain
[219] SAl farted on my arm
[218] hi and hello
[217] The fireman told me
[216]if peter pan was naked...
[215] forever temporary
[214] I cant count to...
[213] Butcher's Hook!!!!
[212] iron your lips
[211]Have I told you lately?
[209] who knows what entry...
[202] I'M RETAWDED!
[200] Where have all the...
[199]
[197] 2! 4! 6! 8! WHO DO I...
[195]Its been a while
[191] urg
[192] Even if...
[189] Save the Night
[187] NIKOLA!
[184] my bonnie lied, so I...
[183] Denial, revisited
[181] Blink 182??
[180] OoOOOooOOoBArAcUdA!
[179] mexico pictures finally
[177] I saw your butt and...
[175]thursday night
[174] Its the end of the world
[172] BOP!
[171] Monday Maddness
[170] Hecho en MexicO!
[169] the nite before mexico
[168] SO lame
[166] climax coming in my way
[165] the magical sitar
[164] hungry eyes
[162] Onion rings are...
[161] To Grandma's House She...
[160] THE CAR SHOW!!!!
[158] Polka dancing chEEt-O...
[157] monday
[156] picture this...
[155] pretend for you
[154] one for the road
[153] Didn't tell myself
[152] thoughts compressed
[151] dental floss and remote...
[150] puddles of cream cheese
[147] the cow talks!
[145] an entry to skip
[146] A nice balance
[143] ursala 1000
[140] SO lame and very much...
[139] hollywood horror
[138] and would you...
[136] Say Sneeze?
[137]Say what?
[135]Nothings wrong
[134]so fresh and so...
[132] dont read..
[133] and and and... is DNA...
[131]
[130]the word is oi
[129]look a duck
[127]
[128] fade away real slow
[126] Duckpond
[125] Leona said...
[124] Feed the Sheep
[123]P-P-P-PICTURES!
[121]He needs salt
[120] volcon logic
[119]Incandifamous
[117] ear-lee-ness
[114]It starts
[111]cheerio darling,...
[113] EVERYWHERE!
[110]SO HI
[109]what a hippo called...
[108]tish-a-moo's
[107]and I said whoo whoo
[106]jellyfishing...
[105]Once upon a german...
[104]Eat Our Chips
[103]?sselesnes detsiwt?
[101]Dalmations
[102]100!!!!!!!! BOTTLES...
[100]I LIKE EGGS!
[98]dun dun dun
[97]WHOOOO are you? who...
[95]14 DAYS!
[94]Give me a...
[93]Double what?
[92]pb and smuckers jelly
[91]JENI'S GOT A GUN!
[89]TARZAN RAPED MY FOOT!...
[90]Stringy cheese
[88]Sunday
[86]THE MISSING ENTRY!
[87]BE HAPPY!
[85]Bite my face
[84]Nothing more than...
[82]what flavor is the...
[80]Loads of Laughs
[79] looks like butt
[78]I see bad people
[76]Sitting on the letter...
[74]Warm Bricks and...
[73]so move your car
[70]boys-n-berry chapstick
[69]GET A SIT DIARY!
[68]Its whats for dinner
[67]PICTURES
[66]On behalf of an Ox
[65]BATMAN!
[64]The angry entry
[63]Utters
[62]if u noticed me
[61]Green Pants
[60]i eat rubber bands
[59]break your yoyo
[58]this is a boring entry
[57]don't know why
[56]ducking donkeys,...
[54]KIG-NIG-ITS!
[53]butter scotch tomatoes
[50]hand to hand
[51]Saddened
[49]granny smith apple
[47]gahhhhhh
[45]the size of a peach...
[46]drink my pee
[44]GONE
[43]what if I am a...
[42]and that's what I had...
[41]RAZOR BURN?
[39]Blind Mangos
[38]Effective Butter
[37]Funny Soaps
[35]shoelaces and where...
[34]braindead ducks
[33]Hello kitty committee
[32]and the fork jumped...
[31]I woke up
[30]so I burnt down your...
[29]Boring Bisexual
[28]Bohemian Rapshedy
[27]The berries taste...
[26]turkeys
[25]in my hands again
[24]chunky soup and...
[23]the HAPPY entry
[22] GOOD...
[21] I have to peeeeeee
[19] December 6th
[18] Happiness is Just...
[17]Nothing More Than...
[16]i am happy and I know...
[12]Leaving Spatula
[12]No More School
[10]KB Wasn't Home
[9]15 minutes
[8] And A Side of Buffalo...
[7]Just another day
[6] Head. Shoulders....
[5] Boys Hurt Me
[3]that sucked
[2] Um this is just...
[1]1st entry... EXCITING...
1414 post(s)