I need to stop watching tv. i really do. it just makes me angry or depressed. but then again i love it. not my resulting emotion.. just knowing. Im not the only one with problems. not that i thought that. meh. i should go back home. AH. i just have to ignore her. i just have to put up with her crap for a year or so and get the heck out for good. I just need to do yoga or something. lol. it was helpful before. guess not enough tho. i know tim would think im crazy for wanting to still but. its the right thing to do. no matter how big the fight.. its the right thing to do. i just have to figure out how to deal. maybe i'll just get hypnotized so that my mind channels out her voice. just hers. yeah. thatd be awesome. lol and all i'd hear is 'wah wah wah' like in peanuts cartoons. sweetness. so i guess instead of going to get my pillow as planned... i could go and tame the beast. oi. i want to cut of my face. timmy wont kiss me! he's all sleepafied. that lesbian. i'm bored dang it. and and i waxed me legs :[ not that thats an implication of any sort.. *shifty eyes* he's not even cuddly :( bah humbuggies. so i was make up experimenting.. silver and mexipants dont mix.. nope. uhg, i really dont want to go home. why again? whyyyyy must i go home? im engaged. we're fine. we're good. we're great. and God knows my mother and he should understand at least a little. and its not like i havent tried numerous times. yeah. and yet. i know as much as i fight it.. im gonna end up at the mothers tomorrow. like a stupid dog with its tail between its legs. even tho i didnt do anything. Ja-eez. berries and cream berries and cream.. im a little elf who loves......... berries and cream. if it wasnt for stupid scary movies.. i'd hitch hike to tehachapi for a few days. i wanna spend some time with the family. but movies are soo lame... maybe i will try it. if i killed then i get killed/ everything happens for a reason. whatever happens happens. im gonna go play in the street. whatever happens happens. stupid phrase thing. i will kick u in the tights! mah.. u know whats annoying? clocks. i wanna playyyy. _________________________________________ this is a myspace survey but i dont wanna post it on there soo yeah.. 1. When was the last time you saw your number 4 on myspace? its corina. and like no more than a month ago ish. 2. What's bothering you right now? a bunch of things.. 3. Will you kiss the last person you kissed again? pshh not tonight lazy butt. 4. What is in your wallet? license, business cards, other cards, change.. thats all 5. Wallpaper on your computer's desktop? i think clouds but im not on my computer im on timmys.. his has a guy smoking a cigarette under a tree. kinda gay.. but it looks cool. 6. Background on your cell phone? moving rainbow YAY! 7. Next time you will kiss someone? *sighhhhhhhhh* tomorrrowwwwww 8. Where was your default picture taken? who? oh. uhm, here in this apartment with my webcam. 9. Do you like messages or comments better? messages i guess 10. What time did you wake up? 6a. then 12:30. heh. 11. What is the last thing you ate today? reeses :]] 12. What are you doing this weekend? looking for a job. exercisinggg to the max. deciding once and for all where to live. anddd stuff. 13. Wearing? yellow top and well panties *blush* 14. Who was the last person to send you a text message? idk 16. Listening to? clock ticking.. its making me sleepy 17. Have you ever kissed anyone named Tom? lol no. just tim. 18. What do you smell like? jeni? 19. When was the last time you brushed your teeth? like 15 minutes ago and i'll do it again before sleepingg 20. When you think of your bed, what comes to mind? warm yay! 21. Do you believe in a soul mate? uhg is this question seriously on here??? ask me in a few years when i'm hoping life will make sense.... :/ 22. What do you wear to bed? mostly a shirt (not long sleeve or i feel clasterphobic) and panties.. pj pants if its extra chilly 23. Do you remember your dreams? all the time. and i tell timmy but he says they are boring and always cuts me off right before they get good! haha no he's right they are boring. u have to be there. its just not the same. 24. Do you burn easily in the sun? no I'm brown sillies 25. Have you ever been embarrassed? mhmm. 26. What is your dream car? a lime green tuck :] 27. What are you doing tomorrow? sleep. exercise. jobby lookingness. wait i answered this.. 28. Who do you miss? wah? hmm.. jefri. 29. What are you going to do after this? i guess sleep. nothing better to do. besides.. everyones doing it.. its what all the cool kids are doing. 31. Who was the last person you went somewhere with? timmy 32. What was the last text message you sent? i didnt 33. Have you ever had a crush on your sister's/brother's friend? yes. 34. How good is your eyesight? good i guess 35. Are you a good friend? idk i guess not since i am currently friendless. i think i need another chance. 36. Are you the leader or the follower? i dot lead or follow. i just float. like a balloon. 37. Whose house did you go to last? the mothers. 38. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital? my cousin christina. she had a baby 39. Do you like someone right now? yes. very much. 41. What do you wear more: shorts, slacks, jeans, or sweatpants? Jeans 42. What is the last movie you watched? shawshank redemption. timmy never saw it. he liked it. 43. Name Three Drinks You Drank Today? water. thats it. 44. What are you excited about? uhm. i dont know. ________________________________________ I think its pretty lame that Im not excited about anything right now. so i might as well think of something to get excited about. so im cutting my hair. all of it. its not growing at the pace i want and im sick of waiting... its going short short short and crazy. yeah. exciting. i called sal today. we talked for like less than a minute and he said he'd call back but he didnt. i guess he doesnt like me anymore. i think its cuz stephanie doesnt like me. idk why. o well. maybe i need to leave all those people behind me. well. im gonna go steal timmy's pillow. muahaha. maybe he'll kiss me now.. absence makes the heart grow fonder? who ever said that needs to be shot. ive been saying that a lot lately.. hehe its funny cuz its truee. i got that song stuck in my head "hip hip. chin chin".. thats all i know. its sexy. k. nightie night night.