July 21 2004 12:55 am Scars haven't bothered me before but now thats all I'm thinking about. I'm trying to protect myself b/c I don't want anyone to see the scars. I still feel so stupid for doing it so I think I'm just going to stop. Just like that. I feel like I don't really need it anymore so whats the point? 5:20 am And now through it all scars don't seem to matter. I think I can hide all of them. Even if some sees it it doesn't seem to matter. Its like its me get over it. I think I can keep this. Maybe I'll just fall apart. No one seems to notice so its ok. Its like its already happened. I've fell apart and I'm left picking it all up. Like it doesn't matter to anyone and I have to do everything. I have to save myself. And maybe its just not possible.--