I want someone who will love me but I have to love myself first. I understand this now. I have to take everything slow. So maybe this time it may be worth it. Be friends with him before you want to sleep with him. I have to remind myself of this everytime I look at him. I feel like a whore b/c of the one and a half-night-stand. Do I really want to be that easy? I guess I thought he really liked me. But he didn't like me enough to even want to understand me. He never once took interest in my poetry, music, or art. It's pretty sad that I was wishing for so much more than I could have ever got from him. And it was just stupidity that got me so heart broken. And I could kick myself every day for that. I want no pity for this mistake. I guess I thought more of the attention than anything else. Someone paid me the attention I thought I deserved and in reality I didn't deserve that at all. The lust in a person's eyes when they look at me makes me sick. I really hate it.--