This is Monday night...I can't stand this shit! I'm depressed as hell!!! I can't go to sleep without someone at my side! It feels so damn lonely when when no ones here to hold or no ones holding me! I feel like I'm breaking down and I can't breath! God I love Janis Joplin! Her voice and words are like an angles! I only have her music tonight to sooth my seighs. I miss Nicole so much right now! My body's acking from her not being here. I know that she has alot on her mind now with all these guys, but I want her to love me so bad. I know that she does, but I want her to realy love me! I miss Kenndal too but then again I guess I alwayz will. I mean hell I'm having his child! I'm happy over all though! Verry happy! It's juzt that night time is verry hard for me! And I fuckin hate being alone, expecially at night! I wish she was here or I was there with her! Hell she juzt lives right down the road, so if I get to missing her anymore then I already am I might juzt sneak out and go to her house, though I don't know how I would get her attention and not her parents 'cuz her room is on the top floor!