Why is it that everytime things are going well, everytime my heart decides that it loves someone or something, that something or someone is taken away unfairly. He leaves soon, he's taught me so much about life and the world around me. I've learned so much. I wish that I could squeeze myself into his carry-on bag and go with him. Can't I? I will see him over Thanksgiving, but it's not enough. I stay up at night just thinking about his handsome face and try to hear his amazingly hot voice talk about the most boring things, making them vivid and real, and interesting in my mind. Where will that go? My life will be so boring and so un-interesting when he leaves. He's not like anyone else. When I look in the yearbook everyone looks the same, everyone has the same haircut, the same "look".. There is no difference. And it scares me. Who am I going to talk to about things that really matter to me. Who can I share my feelings with, who is there that will understand. No one. I feel like I will be alone when he leaves in 3 days. OH why does he have to leave?.....He's going out and seeing the world, and gaining knowledge, not only that but the best thing life can give you...experience. And I am stuck here in Utah where everything is just so happy-go-lucky in this stupid controlled community. One up-side to all of this. I am going to Venice with him for 2 weeks over his spring break....only of course if my grades are up to scratch and so is my swimming. Man,..I remember when I swam for fun, not because it was just another job on Chelsea's to-do list. I miss those days....now they are just memory. I can't say this about alot of people, but he's changed me, and my perspective on life and the things around me. I love him. And it's not like Sammy or any of my other stupid crushes..this time it's real...because when I am with him, even when he makes me angry I care for him in a way that has never been before I love him I miss him.