10:20 PM
so here's the thing, he's laying on my bed, his legs bent and one of my pillows tucked under his arm. he's laying on his back with his cell phone pressed against his ears. he's talking and talking and talking to some figure that i despise. she's not existing here, but she's existing wherever she is. i'm trying to notice if his voice changes when he talks to her like when he used to talk to his significant other. the change isnt too much, but then i try to figure out if he talks to her the same way he talks to me. i can't tell. i can't tell because i'm sitting here blinking and trying not to listen too much. i wish someone would call me and i could act kind of awkward and talk to them. i wish some random person would call me and let me say a bunch of shit just to fill the air.
3:35 AM
and now he's sleeping next to me.
And I wish I could have called you.