the computer seems to be moving. now im not sure if its actually doing that or if ive just become so completely fucked up from lack of sleep that im in this requiem for a dream-eque state in which my computer (not the fridge) will jump out at me at any given moment. in addition, i feel good. i just talked to numerous brown folk, and hopefully we'll be able to meet up mid september. of course, the pessimism is telling me that we wont, and i always tend to go with that. i miss the people more than ever, it sucks, i dont like talking to people online cuz i make an ass out of myself, im stupid, im annoying, and im not myself. i wish i could have a jet. so i could fly anywhere. i would make it small so i could fit it into my backyard. and it would be a secret jet so that air control peoples wouldnt know about it. my new goal in life is to build a jet. then i can fly to brown people. what materials are needed for jet building? many music exchanges today, much cd burning tomorrow. my computer will probably die because its a stupid fucker and cant take the HEAT. psh. i think im just rambling now. a disgusting mix of kahluah, absolut, beer, and this horrible german shit has rendered me quite fucked. yet i am making no mistakes in my typing. due, in part, to the fact that i am typing at the speed of 1 word per minute or something like that. alchohol does not fare well on me at times. andy, greetings my latvian buddy. eastern europeans suck, i feel for u. turnip just came back from venice and she bought a lot of glass. i hate it when people say things for shock value that really isnt shocking at all. why must you? it puts me in such an uncormafortable postition reallyy. i dont know what to sya am i supposedd to laugh or gasp or what? i like when people are genuine. people in brown were genuine. they never bullshitted. if they fooled around with 10 people, they didnt lie about it, they didnt talk behind back, or carry knives around to stab you with when they felt like it, and they were nice. and i think they were very nice. my brain feels funky. i feel fiuky. that was FUNKY. im glad that the people i talk to from brown dont lie to me. when i ramble, they tell me that its annoying. here, the people lie, and act cool, and hmph. im the only gay eskimooooo in my tribe. i think im gonna play guitar. thats what im gonna do after i build my jet. zander thinks im gonna kill my kids. and we decided that we're gonna get married because we both already know that we're gonna cheat on our spouses...but if we get married it wouldnt even be cheating. i know i couldnt stay with only 1 person my whole life. i get bored too easily. and ilose interest in guys too easily. i dont know why though. laurabora says its about maturity and she may be right, but i know plenty of older people who told me theyre like this too. why cant i stay liking the same person for more than a few weeks? actually not, i stop liking them when i think theyre interested in me. that sucks even more. i miss everyone. zander told me i was stuck up when he met me. hes mean sometimes it makes me feel bad when people say mean things. im laughing right now for no reason im laughing laughing i wanna go outside but the alarm will go off. i wanna cuddle with someone, i wanna make out with someone, anything. i need human contact with people MY OWN AGE MAN. under 60, please. tomorrow, i will perhaps write a less drunken entry. my head hurts. i like the song teardrop from massive attack. i like when girls sing whinily and i need to try to get used to bjork cuz i know that once u get into her her music is fantasticular. i always say that word, and then i think of testicular and that makes me think of tom green because of his testicular cancer and then i think about the bum bum song and i think about butts and what is a good but? small or big? magazines=small but i hear guys prefer big butts. but i think girls are sinking to an all time low by wearing padded pants. thats like putitng a pillow under your tushy and shoving it into your pants. i think that was the high point in this..strange entry, ill leave you at that. but some questions for you to ponder after youve finished with this entry- 1. do the chickens have large talons? 2. what is the difference between a duck? (some guy in my dads frat used to ask that question to everyone) 3. will someone catch me a delicious bass? that would be romantic.