steph is such a dumbass. she went and told pat i thought he was hot. and then told me that she told him that right when he walked by. i know its really childish, but still, i dont want people to know these things. even though hes bangin. im likin the fact that i like someone, this feeling has been missed, and now i have it again. i just dont know what to do about it. i really wish i had someone. i wish there was someone like ricky from american beauty who was "just curious" or whatever he said. that would be wicked cool. ha, wicked. key club interviews blew my ass today, i was so bad. but i wanna be rep so bad but i sucked hard. pshyah! i have a major problem with being attracted to assholes, or guys who treat me like shit. i dont understand why all the nice guys are so blech to me in terms of liking them. cuz they really are perfect. it sucks. i took a ceffeine pill for the first time this morning, i felt like i was on speed, i couldnt sit still all day and i had no appetite, and i still dont. i havent eaten anything except for the pretzels that i will now tell you about!fdkghlkdrjhg then i went to the nurse and she gave me pretzels. i think my calorie intake for today is 10 or something. im making a cherry blintz right now, too exciting. i also read "The Nurse From Blue Lagoon" or some shit like that in mrs dentons office. i wanna hook up with someone right now really badly. ew, on real sex one night, there was s segment about these life sized dolls that had holes in all the right places, and really gross horny men had sex with them. narsty. lunch was insane. everyone was on extacy or something, i donno what was goin on right thurr but it was some fun stuff. MY ANUS IS BLEEDING! I AM A BANANA -I AM A CONSUMER WHORE! -AND HOW! etc. i love rejected, im glad i learned about them this summer. so twisted, its great. and im sure no one knows what im talking about. i miss brown, i need to meet up with laura ana and jess asap; im in severe deprivation mode. isnt my life so exciting. my god, i would be jealous of me if i were you. hot diggity damn