first of all, whoever wrote the comments on the other entry, and i think i know who it is...was is my soul sista??...of course i miss you stupid. i tell you that EVERY DAY when i talk to u. and if i dont tell you enough, well im sorry, but i miss u and i love u oodles and oodles of noodles, and i cant wait to see you, and btw, you have to come over and teach my mom how to make iron on shirts, cuz shes into that now for some reason. anyway, i love you my little underappreciated, unloved child (IM JUST KIDDING, DONT TAKE THAT SERIOUSLY!! i know how you tend to do that at times, and its not true :) - ) i went to the eye doctor yesterday and he plucked out 3 eyelashes. i thought it would hurt but it didnt. my eye feels better but im a bit upset. it turns out i cant see jack shit out of my right eye. or left eye. i forgot, and i cant figure it out, cuz the eye that was seeing bad at my examination is seeing well now, and the "good eye" is seeing bad now. can eyes do that? switch how good they are every once in a while for fun? whatever, glasses would be cool. or contacts, cuz we all know how i love putting things in my eye...on my eye, everything else. i feel sick. im not hungry, and i feel really shaky and jumpy. my mom tells me she thinks im becoming an anorexic and thats crazy. first of all, just because u drink a lot of water doesnt mean youre anorexic. second of all, im not eating cuz i feel sick. and i would probably throw it up anyway. unless it was sushi. i like sushi, i would make it stay down there. the secrets out...im not mad, i hope someone ISNT mad at me...i was actually scared of the disappointment i might be getting from someone, had they found out. im sorry, you know who you are. the only reason i didnt tell you is cuz i thought u would be disappointed in me :( and that makes me sad. and its not cuz i didnt wanna see you, i'll explain everything later...whatever, not really a big deal, im sure everythings cool/will be cool, if only my leg would stop shaking. what is it with this MySpace business? hm, must look into that. oh, and someone let me know whats going on for sept 18th. i can go, i just need some place to stay. do i smell a reunion of my lovely, soft gooey choclatey brownies in the air? i think i do...if the plans dont fall through. lets not let them fall through, k? i feel like something is wrong with me now. i mean, im the last person who would ever have an eating disorder. i love food too much. i really really love food. especcially shrimp. and japanese, and jesus, i could NEVER be a vegetarian cuz i love meat too much. but its weirding me out that im suddenly not very hungry, and im becoming obsessed with calories, and fat, and all that crap. but then again, maybe im just getting scared cuz this is my first diet-like-thing, and i dont know how they go. could be. question, and i know this might sound stupid, but its really important to me - do people with eating disorders get hungry? or do they stop wanting food? because i used to think that they felt hungry, but they convinced themselves that being thin was more important than food. i know that this sounds like all im doing is seeking attention, but im really not. im just worried. even though moms tend to worry too much, and shes the one that put the idea of anorexia into my head, and they are usually wrong. so im sure theres nothing to worry about. wow this really is so unlike me. anyway, as soon as i lose all my brown pounds, im getting a big mac, large fries, a fettucini alfredo, LOTS of bread, easy MAC, 243579 krispy kremes, MY FUCKING STARBUCKS PRE-MADE FRAPS!, jelly donuts, CHEESE, peanut butter mmmmm, the banana fudge chunk ice cream that has been sitting in my fridge for quite a while, patiently waiting for me to eat it, and lots and lots and lots and lots of chocolate. i think i answered my question...and i am OK. another ridiculous (and ridiculously long, really sorry about that) ME entry, blah. and i (me me) know how boring it gets when people use their journals to write down EVERY single boring thing they did that day, which i think i might have, so im sorry, and i know that stories about the eye doctor arent the most exciting, so if anyone actually read that, you're very cool and you also have no life, but thanks. (and thanks to everyone who NEVER comments. ya'll is beautiful) p.s. good luck to everyone whos starting school tomorrow, i wish you luck in the new school year and in waking up at the butt crack of dawn tomorrow morning :)