i'd be left with nothing without him. since my friends, yeah the four of them, it's just alskdasd right now. i never get to talk to one because she's at a differnt school and we're both busy and never get to talk. another well i don't know wat she thinks about me. we've been friends forever, and lately she's just so shady with our friendship. one lives forever away, although it doesn't hurt our friendship, it'd just be a million trillion gazillion times better if we were together. i love her to death, and she keeps me in line. and the other, i love also it's just so hard to explain. the need to be.. in? i don't know. and everything lately with him just seems like, i don't kno wat he's in this for. i know he loves me, and i kno i love him. those things i am certain about, but what about in a year? he doesn't tell me things, anything in his life. i just find out today that he's possibly going to visit family in ecuador and possibly to to europe becase my mom asked if he was working at the band in the summer. that hurt bad enough that he didn't tell me, but than i find out he's going with sean. i'm so happy for him to have the chance to go visit his family he probably hasn't seen in years, and go experience europe, especially with his best friend. it sounds amazing. but where do i fit in, do i have a place in his future? i don't know if he even takes this seriously, i always thought he did. it hurts so bad now. i talked to him about it, a little. not about the trip. aslkdjaskdjasd ouuuuuuuuccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhh :(