i feel so selfish, and unappreaciative wen i see how much worse some people's lives are than mine. why must i insist on taking advantage of the people in my life, people who i love? why do i take advantage of the food that is in my refrigerator, and has never been empty? why do i put garbage into my body, and than sit on my lazy butt all day? why don't i take advantage of education that is free for me? think about that. starting your future is free, right in front of you. some people don't have that chance, and some believe it or not, would kill to have things the majority of America is able to give. most of us, not only have food, shelter, and clothes on our backs, but love. it is all right in front of our eyes, we don't need to search or fight for it. it's right there, and half the time we walk right on by what we should be so thankful for. i know for a fact that i don't appreaciate my parents as much as i should, or as much as they deserve. they work just to keep us safe, and provide us what we need. how do we repay them? by asking for money to go to the mall, or by shoving our bad day's grief, which would be a good day to someone else, right in their face. they don't work for themselves, they work for us. i realize not every family is like that, but some are, and that's how mine is. this teenager attitude is ridiculous, it is completely unnecessary, and an embarassment to all parents out there. all they want for us is to grow up, and show them they've done a good job. they try so hard, and we try as much as possible to keep them out of our lives. there's something wrong with that picture. but it's not getting better, it keeps getting worse. i started talking to an old friend today, possibly someone who was more than a friend. he reminds me of how much i've changed over the past three years. that's all i think about lately. i'm either stuck in the past or stuck in the future, never am i focused on the present.