For a long,LONG time, I always just sort of pretended in my head that I would one day be a huge star. That the paparazzi would swarm around me, that designers would beg me to wear their clothes to award shows, and premieres, that guys would want to be with me and girls would want to be me. It was all just sort of a day dream, something to think about during science class. I had this huge fear in my head though that I would end up living here, in Columbia, which sad enough is my worst nightmare. I'm not like most people, who dream of becoming doctors, or teachers,etc. I want to be a star. But now I don't just wish a/b being famous. I know for a fact one day I will be a star. I refuse to give up on that. I don't care what I have to do, I will be huge, on the cover of magazines, winning awards,etc. Because that's all I want, I don't have any other career options. I can't be anything else. Performing makes me happy, happier than any A+ on a test, or varsity sports letter has ever made me or will ever make me. Everyone continues to remind me that this is a very hard business to make it in, that I need to be realistic, and have another option "just in case". Well screw that! My parents are far from supportive, or atleast not the way I want them to be. Financially, my dad is extremely supportive, he'll pay for any lesson, or what not. And my mom takes me to rehearsal, and sits in and watches, and she really does support me, but I think she considers this a hobby, a faze, something fun to do in the afternoons. Maybe I'm just babbling. I can't help it, I get chills just thinking of what it would be like to perform on a stage in NYC, and getting a standing ovation. Am i talented enough? I don't know. Sometimes, I tell myself God wouldn't have given me the desire for this unless there was a reason. Why would we be allowed to dream of something that was literally impossible?? I guess we could be though, just like I was allowed to be in practical love w/ the same person for 2 years, and maybe not over him yet. He's made it clear he will NEVER ever like me, and maybe that's why i wont get over him. I guess I really enjoy a challenge. Well i'm gonna stop talking now 'cuz I don't think I'm even making since!