Last night wasn't at all how I planned it. Somewhere in my niave mind I imagined something wonderful happening, I saw myself having an awesome time, and for some reason I really believed maybe he would change his mind about me. But in the end, the only person to change their mind about me was...me. After tonight, I feel bad to say that I am me. Does that make since? It started out boring. No one was at Cocks Corner yet. So I just stood around and talked to adults until finally Kelley arrived. Then, we went where you go to have a good time when you're at a Carolina game and you're in high school. So, all before the game I was actually having a lot of fun, possibly because he wasn't there yet. Then, he got there and I was still having a good time because he was being relatively nice to me. That's the great thing about games, everyone is nice to pretty much everyone. I went into the game for like 2 quarters then left to go back where I was. That's where the story gets worse. He kept trying to hook up with one of my friends, right in front of me. It was such a horrible thing to have to watch. It made me nausious. Don't think that's the bad part. I threw myself at him, and got turned down(not the first time I've been turned down by him). So, some guy from Midlands Tech started talking to me and some how we ended up making out. The thing is, I hated it! It made me feel miserable. This won't make any since, but I felt like I was betraying the guy I liked. Like, if I made out with that guy, then I was giving up on the one that I actually want. Maybe that's ridiculous. Finally, I got people to walk me back to Cocks Corner. Then, I got in a fight with my sister. So, there I was standing in Cocks Corner crying in front of everyone. Kelley came back and we went into the handicap stall and she let me retell the story and cry and have a runny nose and all of those other beautiful things people do when they've had too much to drink and too many heartbreaking moments. Thankfully, she invited me to spend the night with her. So, I went to Kelley's lake house. She fell asleep pretty quickly, but I was cold and couldn't stop replaying the happenings of last night in my mind. I really am happy I have a good friend like Kelley who can take care of me. Thank God for her. So, now I'm all sad. I know a lot of people will read this and be like "I can't believe she actually put this on her public diary, etc". Well, it's MY diary thus I'm gonna write what I want. I just wish I could redo last night!