i feel weird tonight. kayla asked if me and matt were fighting and i said no. we dont see each other enough to fight. maybe i just miss him. maybe i'm just in too deep. its just that this summer is nothing like i planned it to be. i just had a picture perfect summer planned out. my mind wanders a little too much sometimes. i think i just need to cool my jets. but is it normal to miss my boyfriend? to want to be with him? to just want him to be there? to want him to hold me? he hasn't called, hasn't done nothing... then again i have done the same thing. i promised myself i wouldn't follow the same damn patterns. that i didn't want to stop communicating. but he just seems to busy doing things with other people and thas fine. maybe i should just leave him, but thats how my last relationship fell apart. idk. i just dont know to be honest with you. someone tell me to shut up. that i'm being stupid. maybe i am rushing things, maybe i am just being stupid. i just miss him.......... maybe too much. i highly doubt that he misses me half as much as i miss him. i'm starting to doubt a lot of things these days. wtf is my problem. idk. maybe i should call him... but i dont want to be a bother. its so weird the way i feel right now. the way i've felt for the past few days, *SIGH* ANYWAYS me, kara, kayla.. all went to st romans. saw the whole world there. best part WAS SEEING MARIO! YES. that was awesome. had such a good time with him. his main concern was gettin girls numbers and that was great. i love that kid. he's awesome. :) and then who else did i see. one of the FIRST ppl i saw was johnnie and zach.. so that was fun. of course zach couldn't say a damn mother fuckin thing. but that was ok because i didn't want him to. then johnnie was constantly trying to get me to himself... idiot. he's is just plain stupid sometimes. and then who else did i see? JADER! yes haven't talked to him in a HOT MINUTE! :) then i saw stevey, kristy, her bf, gabi, cassie, amanda z, some chicks from a-house, cole, trio, jeffy, stephanie mascardini (her sister is just as crazy and she is), estee... LOL MARIO that was just funny. :), frankie, sam, some other people from ham. it was fun. esp with Mario. i still cant get over that i saw him there. it was so funny. he's a damn trip. and kara gettin that dudes number that was just plain excellent! Me-"that number's from outta state!" Kayla-"i bet he lives in like North Dakota" the dude lives in Wausau or however u spell it. it was ok tho. once i saw matt there and we didn't really hang out. it got me down. *sigh* i just felt weird the whole night. like "he's here, why aren't we together?" but i didn't sweat it. [ok yea i did LMFAO] but i dont want to be obsessive. *sigh* he came with his own people, i came with mine. idk... wtf, o well. i'm done sweatin it. :( [ok... no i'm not] him-"I thought I raised him better than that." me-"I wish u would've." now that was funny. night all... Fe