Eh. Somehow, I managed to find a spot in the apartment (the utility room) where I can just plug in my fan, turn it on, and curl up on the floor with my blanket and pillow and sleep ... without being bothered by all of the banging behind us. A 8:00 this morning, the carpenters were at it again - I think they're making some kind of building to accompany the pool and deck now ... so ... yeah, they're going to be there for a while. I don't see how David can sleep through all the hammering and sawing. It's driving me crazy. But this morning, for about half an hour, I just lay in bed - and I hear David leave the apartment and about three minutes later, the hammering stops and I hear people talking a ways from my window. So, of course, I peek out - and there's David, leaning over the fence separating the apartment building property from the house behind us. And he's talking to the carpenters. This hasn't happened before, so I decide to be nosy and open the window to listen. Grr, it was muggy. Anyway, the owner of the house came over to the fence and started to apologize for all the noise and told David that they should be done by this time next week - and David said that was all well and good, but not the reason why he came over. WHY did he go over, do you ask? He said he wanted to thank them. GAH?! He told them about how his "little brother has insomnia" and that their hammering prevents me from going back to sleep during the day, which makes deprives me of sleep, which in turn makes me get into bed and to sleep earlier ... Grrr. I bet he's in cahoots with them! I bet he's PAYING them to keep me up. I slammed the window shut. Ugh, that upsets me. So I laid in bed for a while and pretended to be reading when David came in to tell me that he was going to go out with some friends. He was gone by 9:30 ... YES! So I grabbed my blanket and pillow and started to wander around the apartment, trying to find the spot where the least amount of noise is ... I found the laundry room. Yyyyyyeeeeessssssss ... I plugged in my fan and closed myself in and there I was ... I was asleep within minutes. I woke up at 1:00. Ha! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAA! Sleep is a beautiful thing. Aren't I clever? I have class tonight, so I won't be getting in until 9:00 or maybe a little after. I don't really feel like going out today, but I do kind of still need to shop for a black cape, green/grey striped scarf, and the Slytherin logo to sew onto the cape. Damn that Melissa for already HAVING all of her Hermione junk. Turns out, she was Hermione for Halloween two years ago. DAMNIT! Maybe she can help me. I need a new wand, though. I can't seem to find mine ... Wiccan wand, not wizard wand. So I was thinking of looking at that new ... uhm ... New Age store down at the Emory Center next to the Wesleyan Park Plaza. Jody said they had lots of supplies ... maybe they'll have wands. I've been meaning to get a new wand anyway. Mine's been pretty beat up since high school. Once, my grandmother found it and ... well ... it met my grandfather's wittling knife after that. I really want one made of birch, with a Celtic knot carve around the base tip. But ... *sigh* ... I need money. But I also need a new wand before Summer Solstice ... ... which is in THREE DAYS. Yyyyyeeeeaaaahhhhh .... I may go out tomorrow to shop instead. I really don't feel like going out today. Still need to find pictures from Harry Potter Bingo, though. All this stuff I have to do - all thrown onto me now - my head feels like it's going to explode. And ... somehow I just managed to drink half a gallon of milk in less than an hour ... _________________________________________________________________
What's this?
What animated winter holiday character are you? ((HA! HahahahahahahahahahahaHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Hehehe!)) _____________________________________________________________________ Dreams. I had a lot of them last night. I woke up this afternoon to a normal one, however, that just made me ... want to go back to sleep, though I couldn't. Some dreams last night were good ... some of them ... weren't. But, nevertheless, I'm still in a pretty good mood today! First dream: Not a good dream. I'm in the dark. I'm just ... in solid darkness, but I feel like something is closing in on me - then I find myself in this very dim/bluish-tinted light room. I feel like I'm in a prison of sorts ... and I'm just walking down this wide hall, and there are bars on each side of me. Dark figures are in these cells, they're all looking at me. I feel like I'm not supposed to be there ... yet ... I need to be there. I feel like I have to let them out. But I feel like I'm holding my breath, like I can't breathe - like ... I'm underwater. But I just flick my right wrist a little - and suddenly, all of the doors clank open, and everyone walks out, happy to be free. I stop walking, but people keep coming up to me, touching my arms, kissing my cheeks, saying thank you as they walk by. One woman with black hair - whom felt familiar to me - hugged me super-tight, kissed my forehead, said thank you and walked off with everyone else. But there were so many of them, it was like a sea of people dressed in black, in this bluish, dim light. But then, it was like the sea was parted ... and there was this ... guy there ... same size as me, same age, height ... he was thin, wore this skin-tight black, long-sleeved shirt. He had silver hair ... dark, silver hair and indigo eyes that seemed to glow their own color despite the tint of the room. And I was happy to see him. For some reason, I was overjoyed that he was there - and because he was there, I felt so calm, so very, very calm ... Like everything was going to be all right, as long as I stayed with him. And he just stood there, about six feet from me, and people walked around us, and didn't walk between us ... But I still felt as if I couldn't breathe, like I was drowning. And this boy ... I don't know his name ... but he came toward me, cupped my face in his hands, smiled very softly and said something ... I don't remember what he said, but I didn't want to be apart from him ... ever. I felt like he was a piece of me. That I needed him. Then he said "open your eyes." And I realized that I'd had my eyes closed all of this time. So I open them. But I'm not in the room anymore. My eyes are blurry, and they sting a bit, but I still can't breathe - I stare ahead, I see a face lingering over me, but it's distorted ... ... like I'm underwater. And then I realize ... that I am. And I sit up with a start, gasping for air. I -had- been underwater ... in a bathtub. And I try to rub my eyes clear. As water drains out of my ears, I can hear the person next to me move. I don't like this person - I can feel danger and just ... dislike for this person next to me. And I'm just gasping for air - and I love air, I really really really love air. I'm very wet, and I'm very happy to have air ... but I just don't like the person next to me. Then the person says something to me, I don't remember what it was, but I remember that it wasn't very nice, and it pissed me off. It's a man - it's an old man. He touches my shoulder and I glare at him. He's not supposed to touch me! I scream/roar at him and grab this razor from the soap dish and just - slam it AND my hand into his left cheek ... and it sends him flying to the wall. I can tell that not only is it going to leave a deep gash on his cheek, but it's also going to leave a REALLY bad bruise ... and he'll have whiplash most definitely. (For some reason, I just know the outcome of it ... I don't know why.) He's clutching his cheek, it's bleeding - oh yes, it is bleeding. And GOOD. He pissed me off, he's a danger, he deserves to bleed. I would have killed him, too, if I hadn't promised someone that I wouldn't ... yet. And I just jump out of the water, grab this huge towel and wrap it around me. I hiss and spit at the man - I mean, I really don't like this guy - and I start to leave the room, when I suddenly and accidentally run into Niveus at the door. I take a step back and bow my head apologetically and tell her I'm sorry ... then I rush past her, and into the bedroom - hearing the old man moan or something, say something, writhing on the floor ... Then I close myself off in this ... closet. And I stay in there, with the towel wrapped around me, dripping wet and hugging my knees. I don't know how long I was in there, but I hear Niveus walk up to the closet door, and spoke softly, trying to coax me out. "Larc?" she says, "You can come out now. It's all right." I don't say anything, but I look up at the door, even though I can't see her. I ask, very quietly - it comes out more like a hushed and hurried whisper - "Is he gone?" She says, "Yes. He's gone. We're alone. You can come out now." Then I go back to staring at my knees, even though the closet is very dark, but I know where they are. And I just whisper back at her, "He touched me." And she keeps talking, very softly, nice, "I could tell ... from how you yelled. You hurt him pretty bad." Me: *a little louder* "Good." Her: "He'll have a scar." Me: *defiantly, still a little louder* "GOOD!" Her: "Larc, please come out." I don't know why she was trying to get me to come out; she could have very easily just opened the door ... "I'll comb your hair," she says. I feel like I've lost my voice again, but I do finally stand up and open the door; I peek out at her ... and she smiles at me. This makes me smile a little back at her. She asks me if I'm going to get dressed. I say "can I stay in here for a while?" (So I won't be in anyone's way.) But she grabs onto my towel and pulls me out of the closet and into her arms. And she just holds me for a while. And I just ... melt in her arms. Then I wake up. Second dream: I remember being in a dark-ish room, and walking toward this small crystal on this ... altar-looking thing. I'm very content in this dream. I touch the crystal, and suddenly, these very beautiful branches start to grow from it. It's so beautiful - it reminds me of a fractal, just ... always continuing, spreading. And I'm overcome with just ... pleasure. There's so much pleasure inside of me, that I feel like it's almost painful, it feels so good - and it lasts for so long, as these fractal crystals keep growing around me. I find myself writhing on the floor, from side to side, just ... overcome with this intense feeling of pleasure. I don't really want it to stop, but then, it's almost like torture to me, it feels just ... so good. I know there is a release somewhere, there has to be. I long for it, but it just feel so good enough as it is. I'm crying out from time to time ... just ... writhing and squirming, like I just can't take it. And I'm surrounded by this web of crystalline branches. I can hear them "singing" ... that crystalline sound ... it's beautiful. Then finally, I break. The pleasure releases, and I collapse ... happy. And as this happens, my eyes open and I jerk - I realize that I'm in bed ... my head is on Niveus' shoulder. I raise my head. Had I been sleeping? I don't know. But I bury myself in the blankets, because I know that I'm nude, and I just stare at her from under the blankets. She opens her eyes and looks at me ... and smiles. I'm happy. This dream made me happy. And she whispers to me and strokes the tip of my nose. "So modest." I wrap my arm around her middle and rest my head on her stomach. And I smile. I'm happy. I wake up. Last Dream: This was a normal dream. I was with a group of people from college - and a heavy-set, red-haired, freckled girl named Laurie. And we had to go around to all of these places to perform tasks and fill out these papers for some class - like a field trip. And as we're doing all of this, we went into this courthouse-looking building and there was another group there, doing the same thing we were. So my group decided that their group should just combine with ours and we could all work together. So we all had small groups of five. I didn't really know what I was doing there. I had all of my work done already - somehow. But, from the other class, in my small group of five, was the silver-haired, indigo-eyed boy from the other dream. And all I wanted to do was spend time with him. We didn't really say anything to each other ... but I know that we knew each other ... somehow. And I knew his name in the dream, but I can't remember it now. I just felt ... totally calm around him, happy - it was a feeling that made me want to stay with him. And we just kept being pulled from one place to another to do all of these tasks ... but ... I don't remember what they were. And then we were going off to do this other task, and as the people were walking in this marble room, I feel this light tug on the back of my shirt - very light, but it pulls me back and the people just keep walking away as I've been stopped. And I realize that it was the boy that was holding my shirt. I could tell that the feeling was mutual - that he wanted to be around me just as much as I wanted to be around him ... And we just stood there for a while, in the massive marble room, in each other's company ... and his fingers kept very lightly playing with the fabric of my shirt. And we just stayed like that ... Until the people came back after doing whatever it was they were supposed to do - and we just rejoined them, like we weren't even gone. He followed my class back to our school, where we sat in this room lit by fluorescent lights (grr) and at this long table where we were supposed to compare notes and such ... and the boy (for some reason I want to call him Yue ... so I will), Yue, he sits a little ways from me. But I still want to be with him. I don't want to be HERE, at the table, I want to be sitting with him somewhere. I keep glancing over at him ... and every time he just smiles back at me, like he's waiting patiently for me to finish ... Then I wake up. I wanted to go back to sleep. I wanted to spend more time with this "Yue" fellow ... everything felt all right with him ... like everything was as it was supposed to be ... Ah, well ... THREE DAYS! Blessed be!