Babble, babble, bitch, bitch Rebel, rebel, party, party Sex, sex, sex And don't forget the violence Blah, blah, blah Got your lovey-dovey sad and lonely Stick your stupid slogan in Everybody sing along! Yes ... I'm back from Ozzfest. It kicked ass, yes. Best one I'd been to. Korn kicks ass live ... they just ... kick ass. They were the best one there ... next to Ozzy, of course. But then, Ozzy's in a classification all his own. Disturbed was suprizingly better than I thought they'd be - plus, you know, Stupify is one of the greatest crowd-interaction concert songs that can ever be performed. Manson was okay - I probably would have enjoyed it more had he played more songs that I knew - I mean, half the songs he played were off of his new album ... and I'd only heard two of those songs. I kept wanting him to play "Dope Hat" - which is my favorite Manson song, but, alas ... mostly new shit. Pun intended. Well, David got us lost on the way up there -construction will do that. We missed Unloco - I wasn't too bent up about it, though. I'd started losing my voice, however, before I even got there, because I had to keep talking over David's loud-ass music ... it's kind of hard to be heard from the backseat, you know, especially when Type O is playing at volume level 20 ... I had no transition spot in my voice by the time we got there ... you'd only get silence. I mean, I could either talk in a very low tone, or in a high, helium-sounding voice - which it the one I had to use when yelling over crowds. They had free Sobe Adrenaline Rush. This rocked. I must have had five or six of the little cups before David finally pulled me away from the tent - I kept shouting "Thank you! Thank you!" to the guy in the tent ... he just laughed at me; I think he thought I was on crack or something. I know that people must have thought Shannon (sister-in-law-to-be) was on crack because she was fucking climbing over people and jumping, like, six feet in the air! Crazy shit. That baby inside of her is going to grow up to love rollercoasters and bungee-jumping, I swear. She was doing fucking CARTWHEELS! I don't know how many cups of Sobe she had ... but David wouldn't let her have any more caffeine for the rest of the day. Sure this couldn't have been good for the baby. Baby's going to grow up liking metal, too. One of the bands, Momento, played a tribute to Dave Williams of Drowning Pool ... it was awesome. Because on July 31, 2002, he played his last concert there at Indy. Several people I saw there were wearing shirts in memory of him. It was so touching. Voivod was ... well ... okay ... I wasn't really too impressed (especially since they came after the kickass band known as Nothingface). I think Jason Newstead got a fan for Christmas or something, because he was having such a good time with the fan in centerstage - he practically made love to the fan. It was hot, I don't blame him. If it was me up there - aside from playing better music - I would have done the same thing. There was a group there called Motograder - they kicked so much fucking ass. Not only were they all decked out in bodypaint, but they also didn't have a bassist - but instead had a keyboardist/synth player and TWO ... yes TWO drummers. Very Slipknot-esque. They were the first band I saw - and they kicked so much ass. Cradle of Filth ... I probably would have enjoyed them more if I didn't have people flying at me from every angle. A moshpit erupted out of nowhere right behind me, and for one whole song, I ended up being one of the people who had to push the guys back into the pit and away from the rest of the crowd. David joined the pit for a while, but then left after, like, two minutes. The guys in there were so fucking buff - a majority of them were twice my size. I was landed on by at least three crowd surfers ... one just flew at me from above just when I'd finished sneezing. It's just, suddenly, the sun was gone - and I knew what that meant, so I shot my arms out and suddenly this guy - about twice my size - lands in my arms - and I actually manage to keep him held up for the two seconds it took for Melissa and a few other guys to hoist him back up in the air. She was all proud of me for keeping his head up - he'd have landed on his neck if it wasn't for me. Melissa's brother's friend Jared asked me if I'd ever heard of something called "divine intervention" - and Darren (Melissa's brother) said "Not during a Cradle concert." And we all just laughed. And Shannon went crowd surfing. She made it all the way up to the bouncers. She was fucking crazy. I like her. I'm so happy to finally be getting a sister, actually. After Cradle, David gave me his cellphone in case we couldn't find each other by the time Disturbed started - because he went off with Scott to get some food and drink for everyone and Scott had a cellphone with him. Melissa and I went off to see Chevelle and on our way, we ran into a pretty girl who stopped us and asked if either of us had a cellphone she could use for two seconds. I looked at Melissa and her brother, and then I just handed the girl David's cell ... he has plenty of minutes, and no roaming charges - I'm sure he wouldn't have cared. It was a good thing, too - because apparently, the girl's friend was lost. She called, she gave the phone back to me, hugged me, kissed my cheek's all French-like, and said "Thank you so much. You're so fucking beautiful." And Darren's friend Troy was like "Aww, Seth got a kiss." Melissa corrected him, "Two kisses!" And then I was suddenly aware that I had a fucking cellphone. And as much as I hate phones, I was willing to forget all about my hate for one day and call up Lindsay and Cris and just let them listen to Ozzy and Korn and Manson ... Why not? He had plenty of minutes and no roaming charges. But I didn't know their numbers. I probably wouldn't have even said anything, just dialed the numbers and let them listen ... not like they could have heard me anyway, considering my voice was almost completely gone by the end of Disturbed. Oh - and for an extra 2 bucks, you could buy your drinks in these "glasses" shaped like bongs - I mean, GUITARS ... yeeeaaaahhhh! Want to hear something uncanny? Jared's wife Nikki and Melissa had never met before or even spoken to each other ... and they wore exactly the same thing. Blue jeans, sneakers that actually almost matched, and a dark tanktop under a long-sleeved white blouse. That was so weird. They seemed to hit it off really well, too. I liked Nikki ... she was the only one out of the entire group that I could actually talk to at eye-level. Yes, we were exactly the same height. Nice. So anyway - Manson was okay. He did this one thing, though, after a song, he said "Someone out there's throwing drugs at me. Now, I'm a good Christian boy ... I don't do that shit." Laughed my ass off. Korn kicked major ass. They played part of Metallica's "One" - it was so great. They were the first group that actually made me want to get up and jump around, sing along, start a good, old-fashioned circle ... unfortunately, by then, my voice was completely gone, so I couldn't scream for them. They even had kareoke on the screens so everyone could sing along to "Falling Away from Me" (which was immediately followed by "One"). And he played my favorite song - yes! The song that introduced me to Korn. Everything was black, suddenly, from somewhere in the left wing - Bagpipes. Lighters were up in the air. Spotlight comes up on Davis, walking out on stage, playing the bagpipes ... and thus begins "Chutes and Ladders." London Bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down London Bridge is falling down, my fair lady. Ozzy's guitarist - his name was Jack Wilde, I think - he did this, like, five-minute long solo that was so fucking kick ass ... but long - and he ended it ... by playing the Star Spangled Banner. People got out their lighters, put their hands over their hearts. It actually made me misty ... I actually shed a tear ... it was so beautiful. I never thought, in all my life, I would actually be at a concert festival with tens of thousands of people, listening to someone play the National Anthem on their guitar ... It was a moment ... It was a beautiful, magical moment. And I wish that each and every one of you could have been there for it. When Ozzy did "Mama, I'm Coming Home" - everyone put their arms around each other and just swayed and sang along ... complete strangers acting as though they were brothers and sisters ... it was so wonderful ... so so wonderful. And I'm happy to announce that Sharon Osborne is 100 percent cancer FREE. It was ... I don't know how to explain it. We stayed for the whole fucking THING. Some guy in a hummer almost crashed into us as we were leaving, though ... he was ready to crash into us if we didn't let him in front of us. He was, like, two inches from the driver's side bumper. So David let him in front ... and brightlighted him all the way to the highway. Of course, here I was, sitting in the back seat, wide awake ... still ... from all the Sobe and ginseng pills I'd had, listening to Manson's HolyWood album and just downing almost every water bottle in the cooler. David was about to fall asleep about halfway between Indy and Louisville ... so when we got to the outskirts of town, I tapped him on the shoulder and told him to pull over - or rather, motioned for him to since I had no voice ... it took a minute, but he finally caught on. I was wide awake and all - especially with Manson's Portrait blaring from the speakers. I don't understand how he thought that listening to hard music would keep him up ... I mean, when he was in high school, he would listen to shit like Manson, Korn, Tool, Nine Inch Nails, and Metallica to put him to SLEEP. So I drove home, he and Shannon fell asleep, and there was no more almost running off the road. Of course, I had to stop at a gas station for some Irish Creme Capp. *smiles* And the kids made it home safely. I was so happy. 3:30 AM, made it home. I passed out on the couch, though. And slept until noon thirty. Didn't wake up ONCE. Shannon woke up around 2:30 as I was getting ready for my job interview at TGIFriday's (they want me to come back on Monday for another one ... I'm not exactly sure why). She was craving. David didn't wake up until around 5-ish - AFTER I got home. Shannon was just sitting there on the couch, eating ice cream (I wasn't surprised). And he walked out of the bedroom, looking groggy and I just looked at him and said "KFC?" And he was like "Well, I'm not cooking. KFC sounds good to me." So KFC it was. And Lindsay! I got myself a new plastic butterknife ... And I got you a spork! *grins big big* Okay ... I think this entry is long enough ... and I'm getting a little tired so ... later days! Blessed be! I love you all! Goddamn mother fucking goddamn mother fucking goddamn mother fuckers! (Thanks to Manson for that one.) P.S. I noticed that while I was at Ozzfest and all day long, my use of profanity has dramatically increased from Wednesday.