I want to kill ... kill ... kill ... KILL ... KILL!!!!!!! Uhm ... no, not really, but according to the dream I had last night, I do. I have three dreams to report ... written down on three pieces of paper ... all of which were somewhat freaky. The first one just for the imagery, the second one because I fucking DIED, and the last one because I was just killing people left and right. Slash slash slash slash slurp. Oh ... and the ghost ... in my room ... yeah, he didn't like me sleeping last night. He also likes to wake me up at 6:30 every morning, that little fucker. Aww ... he's starting to grow on me. Friday's dream: Freaky shit. I don't remember much, but I do remember there being a master plan - and life was going along beyond this mechanical metal door, everything beyond which was scripted and everyone who passed through had a message from God, and followed that message as though it was their script. And I was following around this skinny woman with dark hair and blond streaks, wearing black clothes, hair pulled back in a ... I don't know what those are called, so I'll just say that it was pulled back. I just kept following this woman around like I was a pet ... or an intern ... is there a difference? Anyway ... it was more like a child following a guardian around ... I realize that I'm following her around because I want to learn everything ... and there was something about a fig or a pear or something ... it was like I wanted her to eat the fruit because, not only did I want to see what would happen if she ate it, but I wanted to experience it and taste it ... because I could feel what she felt. But I never got to go beyond the door ... and we're in this white room, but it's not lit very well ... and all of the sudden these faces are in the ceiling of the room ... and this music is playing ... Enya's "Only Time" song, you know? And this man face, looks like a living mask of dark turquoise comes over this man standing to the woman's left, and it speaks ... something about having a message for Adam, and I stare at it ... and stare at it ... and it looks at me, and says that the message is for Adam, not me, and that I shouldn't be listening ... and I feel a little hurt, but turn back to the woman, who's own ceiling mask thing is starting to lower over to her in time with the music ... And then I wake up. Saturday's dream: I don't remember how exactly it started - but I was in this old house and people were scouring this house looking for me and someone else - but I'm disguised so they don't know that I'm me. I'm following around this ghost of a woman - an old woman with wild white and grey hair in a night gown. She truly is like a ghost. She's hard to see and harder to catch, but the people are after her and I want to protect her - because they'll kill her, and her soul would go to the wrong place - so I spend lots of time just following her around and setting false trails for the people to follow. We go into a room upsetairs - with largely, large windows reaching to the ceialing. The sky outside looks like that strange, marina/aquarium blue. She realizes I'm following her and finally stops to look at me. She smiles, pets my head - and I realize that I'm not in my real body, but in someone else's ... and I know that she knows it. The next thing I know, there's a man there ... a tall man, taller than me, and I think he's an ... angel of sorts. He has dark brown hair to his shoulders and .. kind of looks liks a male version of Melissa ... how odd. But anyway, he has a staff with a ten incy long golden glowing tip. It aids me in changing bodies, but before I can change, I have to die. He lays me down strokes my face, keeps saying I'll wake up, to not be afraid ... that i's just like going to sleep. But I'm so scared. I don't want to die - what if something goes wrong? And I don't wake up? He shoves the tip of the staff into my chest. It doesn't hurt. And I feel so tired, but so scared ... and he keeps telling me that everything will be all right ... keeps stroking my hair and face, keeps telling me not to be afraid. Then black. Then my eyes open and I breathe and the man is there, standing over me, smiling and stroking my hair ... says that I'm all right, and welcome back. I'm back in my own body and the one I had been in is gone ... dead, actually - he asks me how I am, and I just latch onto him. I start to cry ... it's at that moment when his partner, a pretty brunette, starts to do the same thing to the old woman ... but the old woman is going to die ... die die ... her soul isn't transferring to to another body - it's going to Heaven ... a much happier place. She smiles at me one more time before she closes her eyes - and I'm filled with this overwhelming sorrow - but the man, I'm still latched onto him, my arms start to stop as I turn around with my back to him, and I feel his hands travel down my sides, resting there, on my bottom ribs - and I just start to cry. I know that I'm relieves that the bad people won't get her ... but ... she's gone ... and she was such a nice, beautiful old lady. I remember the man starting to stroke my hair again ... and that's all ... that's all I remember ... Last dream: Death! Death! Kill kill kill kill kill kill kill kill KILL KILL!!! DIIIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! Or not. This dream ... I was in this building, this very modernesque building with computers ... and I was dressed in this thigh-length pastel blue coat ... thing ... that was very soft and smooth and ... I liked it ... and I had this sword ... this very thin, double-edged sword ... and I knew that I was being followed and annoyed by some people, that I didn't want following and annoying me ... and eventually, I found out that they were trying to get to me to KILL me ... and I just couldn't have any of that. And there was someone else there, that really wasn't on my side OR their side, but they kept saying out Seth ... and Kolibri - that would be me, both times - wasn't quite myself today, and not to test me ... that I had to be stopped, yes, because something was wrong with me, that I wasn't quite me ... but ... I don't know. I just kept doing that foot-tapping thing ... where the bottom of my foot is parallel with my calf and I just keep tapping my toe against the ground/floor/whatever in a sort of bounce thing ... which I really do ... (I just didn't become aware of it really until David pointed it out the other day.) I'm doing that, and even in the dream, I've become terribly self-conscious of it ... and I keep thinking to myself that I should stop, but then, I don't want to stop tapping my foot for the same reason why I want to stop - because it's attracting something. I don't know what, though - energy, attention .. but I don't want attention ... no no, that's not what I want ... But these people, they just keep coming at me, and finally I just snap and start running up the walls and around the room, slicing these people with my sword like it's the most natural thing in the world ... I just keep killing and killing these people ... slash swipe splorge gash kill death die mother fuckers ... But the strange thing is that I'm not really ... angry, really, just frustrated ... and I feel relieved as I'm doing this ... just ... finally letting it all out, and it makes me feel ... free ... Almost ... happy ... I might think. Relieved mainly ... it's a release ... just a release ... that's the last thing I remember ... is just killing these people and feeling ... free. And a computer screen with fire on it ... That's it ... Hmm ... Oh ... and by the way, the word of the week is "plethora." End. Blessed be.