In eight hours, I will be on an operating table ... I'm scared. But I got a letter from Lindsay earlier, which actually makes things a little better. I can't wear my necklace during the surgery, though ... since it's on my neck ... and that's where they have to get to ... I'm scared. Scared that I'm going to wake up tomorrow in the hospital room after surgery ... and no one will be there. So scared. I love my lovely ... I love Melissa. And David and Shannon and the baby and ... Anyone else ... that I have missed ... who knows that I love them - I just can't name them ... I can't think right now. If ... something does happen, if something really DOES go wrong ... please, please ... try to be happy. Try to live happy lives and smile for me. Stay safe and beautiful and share your love, don't hide it. Dream pretty, sleep with Angels. Blessed be all of you. Goodnight ... Hopefully not goodbye ... I love you.