Sometimes the past frightens me. When Rae recalls the dark events in our relationship, all this pain comes back inside me and sometimes I'm confused why she talks about them and why she still talks to Joel and Nick. The two forced her to do something, that deep, deep inside she knew was wrong. They had no reason and no right to get her into the actions that were done, yet what scares me the most is a comment she once told me over the phone. We were talking about what we'll do after this exchange program and what she said, although I never admitted it, struck me. Besides being there for Tristan, because Katie broke up with him (which I find very caring from Rae), she told me that Nick asked her to do something for him again ("a favour") and she said it was sad, but she would probably do it. Out of all the breakups, fights and things she ever said, this discussion, to this day, frightens me the most.