i haven't cried for three nights now. i'm getting better. i'm so tired though. i've worked everyday thus far and i have to work today, friday and saturday. thursday is my only day off. ah well. at least my paycheque will have a good amount on it. even though i don't get paid the best. hey it still feeds my car right? i hate it when people spell faerie "f-a-i-r-y" maybe i'm just retarded but i dislike it very much. i like a boy at work i think. he's the captain for the swim team this year too. i like to flirt with him. awkward moment: 10 50. everyone else had left already. i was in the guard room looking at the schedule. i turn around looking for riley and i see him behind the refrigerator. about to change. i felt rather funny. time to go to therapy. then work. XP --------------- so i get to come home for about an hour. don't know what i want to talk about though. hmm ... i am so not looking forward to school starting. i start on monday. its gonna be hell. all the new sophomores. i want to vomit just thinking about it. i am so glad i'm going to be a senior this year. i hate being the oldest though. then i have to put up with immature little teenagers. ok so i'm still a teenager but i don't believe i act like one. at least i hope i don't. want to get away. want to get away. want to get away. away from highschool. away from home. away from brigham. away from utah. away from everything. ok so maybe not everything but definately the first four. i hate it when people use 4 instead of four. the numbers one through ten are supposed to be spelled out. anything over ten can be used in numerical form. i'm not a grammar freak or anything. i'm going to have to get used to spelling things in capital letters. i don't think my teachers are going to accept "i'm" or "i'll" or "hailey." i don't like capital letters. they bother me. why can't everything be spelled with little letters? the period or puctuation mark indicates the end of a sentence. why use something else too? why do i try to make boring things interesting? i get to work with riley today. he's the boy i think i might like. i'm not sure though. he sure is fun to flirt with though. he never used to talk to me. i always thought he hated me. but now when he talks to me he kind of flirts. maybe i'm just hoping its flirting. i miss having someone to kiss all the time. i have really been craving a make out fest for a while and i can't have one. well, i can't have one whenever i want to have one. a co-worker called my shorts "daisy dukes" yesterday. then he laughed at me. i didn't think there was anything wrong with them. maybe they were kind of short. maybe i need to stop writing meaningless things. but its always good to write. i like having a sit. even if nobody reads it. i would enjoy a comment sometimes but i just like having somewhere to write. and writing takes too long. i can type a whole lot faster than i can write. i have a notebook that i draw in. that helps too. is nobody one or two words? nobody. no body. i guess it could be both. "there is nobody here." "there are no bodies here." doesn't matter. nobody cares but me. maybe an english major. but i don't know if any of you are english majors. if you are an english major let me know.