Feeling: devastated well, he's not here. he didn't come yesterday. he didn't come today. he's not going to be here for a while. on one hand i want to be mad at him. i want to say 'why didn't you buy your ticket earlier? why wasn't this all taken care of before today?' on the other hand it wasn't his fault. its not his fault his boss needed him at the mandatory meeting. its not his fault that he isn't getting his retention. but he was the easiest one to be mad at. but then i got mad at myself for being mad at him. and now i think i'm ok. and i have something else to look forward to later this summer.