i'm a car. gasoline makes me run. today is late start for seniors. i was going to sleep in. but i get a text from ryan at 6 45. so much for my sleeping in. ah well. he said he is going to buy me blood red nail polish. then he asked if he could paint my toes too. i got a little weirded out. i don't like feet. or people touching my feet. Feeling: cold i wish it would be warmer in the mornings. i hate how it is so cold when i wake up so i dress for the cold but then by the end of the day i'm boiling. it frustrates me. practice started yesterday. i did butterfly. i shouldn't have. i'm paying for it today. i had a difficult time putting on my jacket. so its not really my jacket. its ryan's. he told me to keep it saturday night. he said "think of it as collateral, i have to come back for it." so i did just that. it is my new favourite jacket. today in english we have to give our hero presentations. i'm really not looking forward to it. its supposed to be five minutes long. i don't know how the hell i'm going to make it that long. hopefully we'll run out of time and i won't have to do it. knock on wood. i made ryan feel bad last night. he thinks i still like skyler and i'm just using him as rebound. i told him there was no way in hell i was doing that. i don't believe in rebound. if you need someone for a rebound then you have some problems. put you in the slammer and forget you. mister. then you'll miss me. won't you. won't you miss me. won't you miss me. won't you miss me. they are now going to try a face-transplant. it is especially for burn victims. but the only problem is if you react to it wrong your new face can just fall off. i know i'm not gorgeous but i don't think i'm ugly enough to want a face-transplant. but thats my opinion. ever notice how opinion slightly resembles onion? ryan has a llama. i was jealous when he told me. i still have to go play with it. i wish i didn't like him so much. i wish i was just ignorant to the entire male race right now. he told me he would visit me everyday when i move to salt lake. it made me smile. he makes me smile a lot. i admit it. i do like this kid. a lot. ----------- so far ryan has fulfilled ten checks off of my list. and i've only seen him for two days. this may be more promising than i thought. ----------- i was just noticing how rude my commment about needing "rebound guys" was. it really wasn't meant to slam anyone. just me thinking aloud. i really need to know when to keep my thoughts to myself.