In two days I will be home packing to go to Illinois. I thought that the funerals had stopped for a while and it was a good thing. This last summer I went to my old bowling club coach's funeral and now I'm going to my great-grandma's funeral. My sister isn't even coming. It hurts to see how little she cares for the family. I don't get why Mom said it was okay that she didn't. She's had 3 weeks to get her term paper and project done and now she's only got this weekend. Isn't the family suppose to be there for each other in these times? Why do certain people think they are exempted from this? I don't know but if my dad stills wants me to respect my sister, he can forget it. This was the last straw. She already has pissed off my mother and me on several accounts when it comes to Kyle, but this is too far. I told her crossed the line on this one and she isn't trying to change it. She says it's all up to her professor. Bull. She has all week to get the paper and project down. She's already 3 weeks, doing it in one week is a sinch. *Sigh* I just don't see how hard it is to be there for people when they are mourning their loss. -Kat- I may seem crazy Or painfully shy And these scars wouldn't be so hidden If you would just look me in the eye I feel alone here and cold here Though I don't want to die But the only anesthetic that makes me feel anything kills inside I do not want to be afraid I do not want to die inside just to breathe in I'm tired of feeling so numb Relief exists I find it when I am cut Pain I am not alone I am not alone