I can't sleep anymore. I tried last night. I couldn't sleep for at least a half hour after laying down. The only reason I did was because I had painkillers in me. My body won't listen to me anymore. I don't like lying in bed, trying to relax, and I can't get my muscles to loosen up. It's not just physically wrong anymore either. Mentally, I'm burnt out. I just don't have the energy anymore to handle disasters. I was told Haley hurt herself the same way Lady did but luckily it's just strained muscles. I was angry with my dad for being so careless. It's not fair that I felt that way, telling Mom to not have Dad take Haley out until the drive is treated for ice. I shouldn't let that get me hot headed but it did. I won't apologize for it cause I don't want them to think it was just an outburst. It wasn't. I watched Lady go down in a day and lost her the next. I can't lose Haley and when she hurt herself and I found out, I lost it. I can't take it anymore. I just need time to clear my head. Life has had enough games with me. I just want to step back right now and catch a breath. I can't breathe and it's really starting to show. I'm very easy to tick off right now. I don't like being this high strung. I am to a point to begin with. When the nerves jump at every word, every look, it's when I need to just back away and spend some time to myself. I'm just grateful break starts Friday night. Hardly any time to do anything for myself. Plenty of distractions and Haley will be there. I want to visit with friends back home. I'm going to try to, but I can't hope for it. It's like I hope no arguments develop while I'm away from school. I don't have much time on the internet when I do go home so arguing is just so much worse to handle. I just am at the end of my rope. I just need a break before I break in two.