woohoo it's been like, four weeks since i've cut. i'm goin really good so far. blahh although kinda been thinkin bout it a lil more lately... but i think i'm not gonna... cuz of zeke... i talked to him last nite... and i'm not sure... but it was a good talk.. i enjoyed it... he said i was the only thing that was keeping him alive... he keeps talkin bout cuttin and dyin... and even when he talks bout it, he like smiles and shit... i don't like it... and like his friends do it too... but so do mine.. but actually alot of mine have stopped too... which is really good... but yeah i'm here for anybody who ever needs to talk... cuz i don't like people to do it... hehe zeke made me feel real special last nite though... hmm me and jason are talkin a lil... not like we used to.. i miss it... but i guess it's somethin... hayley's gone on vacation with her family, i miss her. she did have her cell, haha then the dork fell in a pool and her cell got wet, so i don't think she has that anymore. and things are really weird with viv... i think she loves justin... but he doesn't love her back.. he doesn't even like her anymore i think... i think he just likes this alexis girl.. not sure... but yeah.. i don't kno... and she's been really depressed lately... i hate seeing her like this... i'm gonna try to help her all i can... but i hope she can get better... she's too young to already be like this... and she doesn't deserve it... hmm hope she calls in a lil... and i also haven't tlaked to lance in forever.. i miss him... and i talked to amanda last nite... and told her bout jason.. that was a bad idea i think... cuz she was just like blah blah blah... meh whatever... i'm really tired... nite ntie