ya kno, i used to always love writing things down. even if they were bad things. but just so i could remember them. so then i could tell someone later or something. but now that i think about it, why does it matter? no one ever reads what i say. and i have no one to talk to, to tell anything to. so why should i bother? i've been needing to write in my journal about the last 2 weeks. i didn't want to at first, but now i want to. but i dont seem much of a reason. i dont have a drive to... god, no one ever seems to want to do anything with me anymore. what, do i have fuckin cooties or some shit? i don't know what the fucks been up with lance. he's actin so fuckin weird lately. and it drives me fuckin crazy. i hate it. i just wish he would be like he used to.... bleh, i dont fuckin know. fuck it. who gives a shit.