It's too bad I've pretty much been scarred for life, thanks to all my past "boy toys". I just CAN'T get the idea out of my head that all I am to a boy is a piece of ass. Even if I'm not. Even if I knew I wasn't, I still wouldn't let myself fall for the boy, because my walls have been put up too high. Too high for anyone to climb. I don't even know what to do. I don't know what he wants, more so what I want. Although I did find it ABSOLUTLY humorous to see all these girls being all flirtatious with him or whatever. And let me be the first to say that a lot of Bonnie girls are quite unfortunate in the looks department. I'm just being honest. All the so called "bonnie boys" would be in paradise if they stepped foot on a Ventura campus. I was also talking to Ben's friend Scott about random crap. Then he was saying stuff like "Oh yeah, those Ventura boys can be really shaddy." I I had to say to that is "Yah, unfortuantly I've had to experience some of them." Well duh, I don't know one boy that goes to my school that ISN'T the least bit shaddy. Jeeze. Thats it. I neeeeedd to figure all this out and try not to run away from everything. But these lyrics won't get out of my head... "The first star you see may not be a star." Have you been listening to Konstantine and as much as I have been Shelby?