If anything, I just want real friends. Not fake ones, that just come with the title of "best friends" and seem to be to all oursiders, ones who I can talk to, and will be there when I need them. I want friends who I can talk to hours on the phone, friends who won't give eachother weird looks when I say something out of the ordinary, I want friends to except me for me. I was obviously used, and not included in certain activities on prom night. Really pissed me off, but obviously what goes around comes around and they got busted, something that wasn't my fault. I've been sick for a couple of days with a sinus infection, normally someone would call to see whats wrong and what not, but nope, I have been mute to the outside world, no call from anyone, I'm just not there. It may be because I've been branching off and hanging out with other people, but it almost seems thats what I have to do seeing as how I'm always the one left out and I can't depend on them for something to do on any given Friday night. I admit, I've been distant, but thats only because I'm left out. They never EVER call to hang out or anything, I don't even remember the last time I have gotten a call, I'm always the one to call them. Sounds to me like I need new friends. Who? Can't think of anything else. Thats why cheerleading sounds so positive to me right now, Marley was telling me how by the end of it all, we will all be like sisters. I need sisters and people I can trust. I just don't seem to have that anymore. What I honestly need right now is Monique. I want her back here, where she rightfully belongs. I almost want to escape from Ventura and move in with her and start over with everything, and have Monique right by my side the way it has always been, or was.