ive finally figuered out why i am so damn insecure and finally i can blame the world for the problems instead of myself!!!hell yea :P. people have always left me alone leavin me to think am i not good enough to stay with so now im thinkin he's leavin next month b/c you weren't a good girl and its a lie(yess i think the same thing about my friends). people leave you b/c you are not for them, or they are fuckin stupid who's ever side you are on, and i shouldnt worry b/c as long as i did my job and did my best the outcome will not kill me im still here and i am very worth the stay. i actually used to feel like i wasnt worth it and i am so glad i have the friends i have or i never would have known i am worth every little thing i am blessed with. and i just figuered out that my boyfriend is my joy. i was so down today and then i saw him and it all lifted up and he hadnt even said anything yet. yes my family and friends are my joy too but if he left ide be pretty darn low and starting all the way from not happy at all. but let me stop boring you people and holla at my lil therapists later. muah ps i just figuered out it is a little my fault but dont bust my bubble and say that