Listening to: Weezer- Freak Me Out
Feeling: preppy
Did you have one of those nights that just reminded you of how big of a slump you're in? Tonight was one of those nights for me. I realized that all of my commitments are in a terrible state right now. With church, I'm not passionate about the band anymore, with work, I'm setting the curve, which sucks and summer school (though there's one day left (thank God)) is beating me up. I don't know what to do with these things, but I'm going to keep them around, because I think for once I finally learned what commitment was. It means being there, especially when things are bad... especially when things are horrible. That's one of the hardest concepts I've had to learn. Life isn't easy. Something like that keeps reminding me that my happiness isn't a top priority like it was when I was a kid. Just because I'm not passionate about these things anymore doesn't mean that I need to give up on them. I need to keep going even when it doesn't feel like it used to. I guess that's what being an adult is. I'm playing guitar alot. I hope I can play music for people this year, nothing would make me happier. I need some things to start happening though. I'll stay in touch. Have a nice night guys.
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