I had traffic school today. It wasn't so bad. I ran into a girl that I had met a few years ago but didn't so much remember. So I came home and decided to go see "Talladega Nights" with some friends. I must say it was the worst comedy I have ever seen, but there was something that I really thank God for in that whole experience. It's very strange how you can seemingly "find God" when you're not looking and how he just sort of makes his prescence so powerfully known to you at the strangest times. I haven't really prayed in a while, but I have TONS to thank him for... for being able to go to college (in 10 days) for one. For potential in me and for change in me that I never saw happening. It sucks too. I hate having to accept that this person that I could've blown up to is not going to be what God has in store for me. I think that I really could have turned my back and just taken photography and ran with it... I'm still running, just in a better direction. I don't like the fact that I have to worry about making decisions that will affect how I'm treated by people and how people view me. The thing is, I know that I could really easily become one of those people who is incredibly agreeable and sociable, but I don't think that's what God wants me for, he wants me to lead, and that's not the easiest thing for me. I don't like to have to lead people in a direction that isn't easy to follow. I can't follow it well myself. That's one discouraging thing about being a Christian, the fact that you will constantly compare yourself to those who are spiritually one step ahead of you. I'm incredibly guilty of that. God knows that I know what needs to be done, it's just so hard for me to just let go and do it. I have to completely surrender in some aspects of my life that I'm not really ready to surrender in. I had a lot more to talk about, and I'm sure I'll rant on later, but I need to be getting to bed. Take it easy on yourselves guys.
Read 0 comments