It's been too long. Here's whats happened. Homecoming... most excellent. Things went very with my friend from NAU (Devan). She had fun and it was a really good time. I don't know what's happened to me lately, but I've felt like a very different person. I got a Canon Rebel... yeah, I know, my dream camera, and it's everything I though it could be. I love it. Anyways, I had an awful day today. I hate Coffee House, come to think of it, I don't know why I ever "loved" Coffee House in the first place. I guess I thought it was cool for me to add to reputation at something like Coffee House. I was wrong. I didn't want it to be like that this year, so I'm not doing a solo act. I hate solo acts. Sorry to keep saying what I hate, but I really do. I've come to completely despise everything that my school's Coffee House has come to represent. I was thinking alot about college this week and I have some choices to make, soon. I could go to Biola, where I could go out into the world and learn about myself and others, or I could go to NAU or ASU and stay close to home and be comfortable. I was thinking about abandoning the idea of Biola, but I love the new way of life it offers. I don't want college to be an extension of all of this ridiculous high school stuff I'm starting to hate. And I really can't stand it. They just stand there and act cool and talk about how legit there music selection is... during Coffee House that is. God it bothers me to no end. I don't like this either, I don't like not liking parts of high school, because I love it, and I almost always have. People need to stop... now. I'm so exhausted but I feel so awake at the same time, I stay up until 1 or 2 every night playing guitar and working in Photostudio. I guess it's good though, because I'm starting to get really passionate and defensive about my photography and my music. In a good way though. I think that might be part of why I'm so bothered by Coffee House right now... because I was like these people are and I'm so ashamed of some of the stuff that I've done. I don't want to be remebered for terrible guitar playing or mediocre lyrics or even shallow humor. I hate the thought of that. And that's why I'm hating Coffee House right now. I don't like seeing people doing things they'll regret. I don't like people doing this stuff for a reaction (like 95% of the people in this show anyways). They do it to get the intial "Great Job... you're so talented." from their peers. And I feel good in a different way too. I stopped liking this girl today. That sounds like a bad thing, but I really liked her since like Sophomore year, and things just came together today and I realized... why am I doing this? She doesn't act like me, she doesn't know me, she doesn't really care about me. So I stopped caring, and I feel like there's no pressure there anymore. I can just play guitar. I can just take pictures. It's a relief. I'm taking off guys. Have a nice 3-day weekend.