Life has been very stange lately. I've become a different person. I don't feel like anything that I do in the next 2 months of my life will matter. Because I will be the exact opposite of that to all of these people that I know. I won't matter to them, and no matter how much they say I will time and time again, I won't. And I feel like that now. I can't hold onto anything too tight because it'll be gone in a few weeks. There are 2 things, however, that I'm not letting go of, those, of course, are photography and music. When people let me down time and time again, I've got 2 things to make me feel worthwhile and show me that I'm not useless like people will try to have me think. I'm leading at my church now too, and I'm not good at it yet. I feel like I should be apologizing every time I'm on stage because it's just not good enough yet. I don't know if these people I'm playing for really know who I am or what I care about. I don't think they do, but what difference do they make anyhow. I got into ASU. I'm going there, like I thought I wouldn't be doing, but now I'm excited, despite my friends who are now evidently against me because I'm ignorant and un-educated about college. After all, I care SO much about what other people think of me. Screw them. Screw high school. I'm done with it and there's no doubt about that. I've learned what I'd hoped to learn going into Saguaro my Freshman year. I learned who people are, and I learned what people can do to you and I learned which people to hold onto and which people to not take seriously... which turned out to be a much larger number than I would've hoped. I'm dead tired right now. I also don't have prom date, and I don't want to freakin' hear anything about it. I don't want to be told what to do by anyone at this point in my life. There's no point to that. I'm going to sleep. Goodnight guys.