Once again I find my self completely haunted by my dreams. I've had very long nights this weekend with very early mornings so I am quite tired, but I can't bring my self to go to bed just yet. I'm almost afraid of what visions I will wake up with. I hate to say it, but I don't think this is going to be my happiest entry, so those in good spirits might want to take their leave. Grandma is here. I came down this morning and gave her a big, cheery hello. She seemed pretty okay--didn't want to go to Church with mom and I though. Something about Catholics not liking Lutheran churches...anyway, church was excrutiatingly long and I wasn't feel too chipper anyways, so that was eh. The family came over this afternoon for a second Christmas dinner for grandma and then some games of poker. That was all quite happy and fun--Grandma loves Kris (big surprise). My grandma is an interesting person. Sometimes I think she can be quite rude, but I reason that's due to her old age. Old people can get like that--all bossy and demanding and such. It's also very hard to get her to understand things clearly. She doesn't hear very well (even with a hearing aid) so she doesn't always follow the conversation correctly. We have to be very clear and careful when speaking to her because once she gets an idea in her head, it's a difficult time correcting it. Grandma is also a prime example of the affects of love. My grandpa died a few years back--3 years, about. And they were the happiest, most in love people you ever did see. His death has crushed her and impacted her tremendously. She can't get over him and never will. And as I went into my room tonight, I heard through her closed door a muttering from her, a quiet and hurried talk and it was clear who she was talking to--her husband. I listened a little, just to make sure she was okay, and I gathered from the mumbles that she was speaking to him as if he were there with her, but she knew simply that he was gone. She said, "I miss you" quite clearly and then uttered some other things. After a pause (during which I am certain she heard him speaking) she laughed a little, then sniffled, and went on talking. She mentioned my name and I walked away at that. It would be the most incredible thing if she could hear him talking to her. I don't know what to think about it--I guess love can make you a little crazy, at the same time, what I heard was perfectly sane. Well, that's about all I can say about that. The incident was both saddening and comforting. One day, those soul mates will have an extroardinary reunion. I guess that's all for now. I hope I don't dream tonight. Best wishes for you all. Carrie