yay, sam an die are going to ventura today. coolass. at least now i can finally go in peace, not be worrying every two seconds about stupid shit...ahem. yeah so i need to buy everyone's christmas presents today, and i have noooo fucking clue what im getting them. Y'all are gettin socks. that should be my new catch phrase...dun duh dun dun....mwahahaha!!! so yeah, its 8 o' clock now and im too damn lazy to get my ass up to the bathroom so i can get ready for zee day. Fire zee MISSILES..... Shit, still processing everything thats happened in the last couple of days, quite a rollercoaster of emotions, dunno what the fuck to feel anymore. so now im completely apathetic and/or confused. yeehaw. Like, the biggest most confusing thing this week, is guys. First, because of certain relationship issues, he wants to be friends with benefits but has yet to bring up the subject again. Yet, he will flirt constantly outside of school, like having me sit on his lap at thee movies.... and then, when we were discussing extreme issues on thee internet, i just come out and say "do you have even the slightest feelings for me???" and then he says that he does, but he doesnt ever want to cross the line of a relationship ever again. so where does this leave me? am i just supposed to get over him? how the fuck do you get over someone if you both like eachother, but arent going out coz one party cant seem to get himself over bullshit from the past?? Honestly, he knows i like him, i know he likes me, so what do we do? i cant wait forever, but o how i want to. i just think that the only way to get over his pain from the past would be to get back out into relationship land, to prove himself wrong. fuuuuuuuuuck.