todays been a weird day..lets just say i was really surprised at something my mom said. when we were eating dinner tonight..i wasnt talking to her at all. and it was just me and her home. and she sat across the table from me. i wasnt very hungry so i just got a spoonful of potatoes and i was sitting there drinking water. well about 10 minutes past with still no talking except she asked how the potatoes tasted *and i didnt answer*.....and a little bit later, she came out and apologized to me for today when she was talking shit....i was like what?!??! thats a first.she never apologizes for anything. it was strange.im still weirded out from it. but yeah. im still not feeling myself lately. the whole stomach thing, and other things. its weird though. i dont have an apitite *i didnt spell that right* anymore. its like food is nasty. i cant explain it. id rather not eat anymore. hopefully i can lose a few pounds. cus i sure could use it. lmao. but for reals.. i need to get out more. this is getting depressing. i feel like i dont have a life. i feel like i went from like going out every weekend, to not going anywhere anymore. speaking of going out. i was driving the truck yesturday and i was coming home from town, and i happened to look over and i could have swore that i saw raymond on the side of the road. my heart like stopped. he is so my boy. hehe. theres just one problem. i havent seen him in like forever. i miss him. i havent realized that until recently. maybe its my lonelyness factor kicking in, but i miss how we used to be inseparable. ohs well. hopefully i can see him again sometime. oh yeah. im pretty sad too. after this week, Hayden is leaving and not coming back :/......im going to miss him. hes switching colleges. i think hes going to U of newmexico or something like that. i cant remember for sure where though. and i didnt get the chance to tell him goodbye either. im totally bummed about that. he left too fast today, and there was a big crowd in front of me, and i couldnt get out in time *tear*..oh how im going to miss him. *sighs* well i dont want to write a novel or anything, so im going to end here. tata my loves ♥ [krystal]