welp i missed my bus somehow... sad huh 17 and still rides a bus... hahaha im not upset about it... woopdeedoo... so i am prolly staying home now... yay but im scared! bryan is free to flirt as he pleases... not like he was eating lunch with me today anyways but still... i dont like to think about it... i spent enough hours crying last night... what scares me more is that theres a football game tonight and if i dont go to school i cant go cuz my moms a b-i-t-c-h about things like that! any excuse she can find to keep me home to babysit i swear!!!! but anyways if he goes... i dunno what ill do... i wont go back to him THATS 4 DAMN SURE! ill be sad to miss a game :( but ill be pissed if bryans goes to it... my sis is going to it tonight... that will piss me off a bit but she's outa my face! the only thing i ever do there anyways is talk talk talk to my friends walk walk walk everywhere... make people jealous (ie... chelsy) by giving bryan hand jobs and such in front of her... it really ticks her off and i love it! well the whore does gada know the boy is mine! and besides that there is nothing else to do... its basically dumb, but good quality time with bryan... but i dont think what we need is quality time anyways :( we need therapy lol beyond this... what i need is simple... what i want on the other hand is complex beyond reason... i want bryan to suprise me today and show up after school 4 no reason (just to make sure im okay -which im not i have a cold and my wrist is swelling bigger... ok starting to think it really is broken!-) anyways i want him to run in grab me and give me a big hug... pick my up swirl me around set me back down and kiss me like he always does... man do i love that! then i want to tell him im sorry and that i want him back... that id give my world up 4 him or that id even give it to him... lol tell him that i cant live without him and thats the truth, tell him how i cried last night till 4 am and tell him he's my life and i dont wanna live without him by my side... ever! will this happen? no... he wont come over :( he'll prolly go to the game knowing my damn luck... then ill cry 4 weeks trying to ignore him and get over him... and i dont want that so lets NOT think about this anymore heheheeh well leave me some comments and ill comment u back when i get a chance! loves ps... the song i listed up there... i have that sooo damn stuck in my head!!! its from that new mtv movie i sang it like all day yesterday that song rox! does anyone know what its called tho? everytime it comes on mtv im in the shower or summin and i miss the credits! grrr