so much for my not drinking/going out this semester. last night was interesting. went to heathers house first to drink with the soccer team, then went to andrews house and then went to ale house. but here is the kicker, charlie was at andrews. and we talked for so long and FUCK i just need him in my life. we go to ale (charlie disapears) and then kicker #2, kerry is there. and we dont speak but smile shyley from afar. while he danced with another girl and i danced with another boy. so im just hanging out drinking and dancing with craig the whole time, yet somehow at the end of the night, shea ends up in my room. the last thing i want. i just want to be like "there is NO WAY i am going to have sex with you, so stop pursuing me okay. dont say you are just going to walk me home and then end up sleeping in my bed" its true that the only apealing guys are the ones that break your heart. including BG even though he likes me now. i am destined to be alone. i went applying for jobs, nowhere is hiring thus far. sweeeeet. oh well, must keep trucking. im going on a real music binge right now.. hello deadmau5 anyways.. goodnight