so i think craig hates me now too. he needed to come pick up the keg tap from my house and i thought he was going to keep it for longer so i asked why and all he said was "plans have changed". i dont usually read into things like that very much, but because its craig, its bad. i deserve him hating me though. and i know it. i deserve a lot of people disliking me. i knew this was going to happen too. i knew "playing the field" was going to bite me in the ass. hard. and look where i am now. ive lost them all.

i am way too far in my own head right now. i just ate like half a block of cheese. i need to talk to someone but i wouldnt evn know what to say because i cant make sense of my own thoughts. i think im going to go the gym and run for a while. sucks though because the gym is a long walk from my house and its blizzarding outside. and i just ate so much cheese and want to vomit.

i learned in my policy class that i need to think of imperfect solutions to my problems. because perfect solutions never really work. the only solution i can think of is sleep.