right now i am looking for some strength. i know i am not a weak person when i look back at things ive pushed through. why cant i draw from those moments some strength to push through now. i need to get my work done!!!!

but im texting B right NOW. i think we are going to meet up in europe.... omgomgomgomg. i know im going to need a lot of strength then too. but i just want to see him. 2 more weeks and i am fucking outttta here. im forcing myself to pull an all night tonight until im done this shit.